Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

xShannonxSammyx

Search for a member

xShannonxSammyx

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2474
  • Number of comments : 119
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About xShannonxSammyx : "Whether you come by book or by film, Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."

xShannonxSammyx's page activity

Visits<b>klondikeberry</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 9:04pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:22am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 8:35pm<b>WCARlover</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:33pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:53pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 6:59pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:03am<b>Lanker</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 6:55am<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:38am<b>addictedtoIASIP</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 10:18pm<b>oxythemoron</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:19am<b>rpherrs</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 12:48pm<b>kingodsucksville</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 7:05pm<b>elvis103</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:31pm<b>WubStep_</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:58am<b>hk1998</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 11:20pm<b>LeMoan</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 11:18pm<b>zin11</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 2:18pm

xShannonxSammyx's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of xShannonxSammyx's badges

xShannonxSammyx's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my first hand job. I started bleeding. FML

#17619671
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39343) - you deserved it (5292)

On 08/30/2011 at 7:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

#17538600
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27612) - you deserved it (5489)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm - animals - by xXangelaXx - United States

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

#17534409
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28670) - you deserved it (37685)

On 08/21/2011 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Emily - United States (New York)

Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

#17404409
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52465) - you deserved it (3500)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that on his last visit, he snuck into the laundry and stole a lacy black thong he assumed was mine. It wasn't. It was my dad's. FML

#17380404
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34811) - you deserved it (3358)

On 08/05/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44086) - you deserved it (2968)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML

#17355150
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26319) - you deserved it (7822)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:55pm - health - by indierocklove - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

#17349963
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53244) - you deserved it (3275)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

#17349963
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53244) - you deserved it (3275)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

#17279585
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26814) - you deserved it (9474)

On 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm - kids - by corasmom (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML

#17253981
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36783) - you deserved it (5214)

On 07/25/2011 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML

#17227905
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62293) - you deserved it (7316)

On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

#17211099
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36048) - you deserved it (3700)

On 07/22/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by oliverP123 - United States (New York)

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44348) - you deserved it (4686)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: