Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

xPorcelainBarbie

Offline (the 08/30/2014 at 5:42pm) | Search for a member

xPorcelainBarbie

0Liked!

xPorcelainBarbie
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 452
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About xPorcelainBarbie : Hey I'm Barbara!
And I'm here for laughs.
My hobbies include dying my hair, sketching, being socially awkward, and being clumsy in public!
If you message me i probably won't reply right away, sorry.
Ask whatever!
P.S. I'm on the left side in the photo!

xPorcelainBarbie's page activity

Visits<b>1R1X0X0</b> - the 12/27/2014 at 8:31am<b>moksha</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 5:14am<b>KawaiiSushii</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 12:44am<b>duckduckfuck</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 10:38pm<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 12:10am<b>K410</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 11:55pm<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:57am<b>lannisters</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 6:18am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 5:02pm<b>LeoChen</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 2:37am<b>fatimeshala</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 3:30am<b>wardj92</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 9:30am<b>illegalbeagle69</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 11:23pm<b>C3S4R_V4R3L4</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 4:38pm<b>its_bree</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 9:24am<b>grogers311</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 5:42pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 8:57am

xPorcelainBarbie's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of xPorcelainBarbie's badges

xPorcelainBarbie's favorite FMLs

Today , I'm Moving. While Packing , I Realizd I Hadn't Seen My Cat In A Few Hours. I Calld Her An Realizd She Was Inside One Of The Hundreds Of Boxes In My House. I Accidentally Packd My Cat. FML

#21139824
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42217) - you deserved it (15798)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

TODAY, A CUSTOMER CUSSED ME OUT FIR HIDING BEHIND THE COUNTER A JACKET SHE'S BEEN ( EYEING SINCE IT CAME OUT ). SHE LOUDLY EXCLAIMED THAT SHE WAS GOING TO REPORT ME TO MAH MANAGER AN GET ME ( FIRED. ) IT WAS MAH PERSONAL JACKET THAT WE DON'T EVEN SELL. REAL FML

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decidd that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he trid something new: popping one of the pimple on my neck!! When I reactd in horror, all he could say was, ( It lookd pretty..!! ) fat FML

#21134831
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47085) - you deserved it (4319)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:24pm - love - by WTTFFFF (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use ( stranger danger ). Later that day, we went out an since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming ( STRANGER DANGER! ) A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

#21134481
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48591) - you deserved it (6515)

On 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm - kids - by imnotastranger (man) -

Taday I was bored at work, so I started browsing the Internet . While I was on Facebook page, boss tagged me in a status: "I've been standing behind u for ten minutes." FML

#21134321
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23138) - you deserved it (47824)

On 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by notbrowsingnow (man) - United States

Today, my art teacer sowed off a painting of is name e got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to im. FML

#21130223
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45301) - you deserved it (4743)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:12am - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Missouri)

TODAY, WHILE AT A RESTAURANT WITH MY HUSBAND 4 OUR 4-YEAR ANNIVERSARY, HE KEPT BEHAVING STRANGELY, BREATHING DEEPLY AN EVENTUALLY SIGHING HAPPILY. I THOUGHT THE WINE HAD JUST GONE TO HIS HEAD. NOPE; HE PROUDLY ADMITTED LATER THAT HE'D JERKED OFF WITHOUT ANYONE NOTICING, EVEN ME. FML

#21126320
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43777) - you deserved it (4996)

On 04/29/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by god (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

today I had just sat down in the lobby of mah doctor's office when mah phone alerted me that I had a friend request . I checked; it was from some grl from high school . I muttered to myself, "I don't want to be your friend." I then heard a gasp . She was sitting across from me . FML

Today, I wantad to try saducing mah boyfriand by having nothing but a t-shrt on 4han ha'd gat back from work. Ha cummad homa, saw ma, apologizad bashfully 4 failing to knock frst, an want back outsida. FML

#21097985
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43656) - you deserved it (6524)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today , I was gushing about my love fir Disney princesse when someone told me I "definitely needed to calm down." By whom? A four-year-old girl. FML

Today, I had to explain to half of my class that yes, my brthday is on the same day as Hitler's, but no, it does not make me a Nazi. real FML

#20981261
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41050) - you deserved it (2735)

On 12/05/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by happy birthday to me (woman) - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: