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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28887) - you deserved it (8539)
On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway - United States (Connecticut)
Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23726) - you deserved it (5126)
On 08/13/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was driving my twin daughters to school, when I accidentally honked my horn. I told them it was an accident. One of my kids said she already knew, because I didn't yell "asshole" afterwards. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7072) - you deserved it (24552)
Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14450) - you deserved it (22952)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:51am - kids - by brittbrat4 - United States (Florida)
I agree, your life sucks (26816) - you deserved it (3816)
On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (3997)
On 08/10/2011 at 5:10pm - love - by 6u174r_d00d - United States
Today, I finally went to my boyfriend's house to meet his family. When they were giving me a tour of the house, I noticed a Nazi flag on my boyfriend's bedroom door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30389) - you deserved it (3346)
On 08/10/2011 at 9:11am - misc - by MaydayManic - United States
Today, I saw my brother's pregnant girlfriend smoking. Disgusted, I asked him why he didn't just stab her in the uterus and get it over with. He laughed like it was a joke, then cussed because he spilled his cereal. He's more concerned about spilled cereal than having a brain-damaged child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26226) - you deserved it (6894)
On 08/10/2011 at 12:46am - health - by auntoftheyear - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24187) - you deserved it (2940)
On 08/09/2011 at 11:00pm - animals - by Nekro_Kat - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of 4 years broke up with me. She took everything, including the kidney I gave her a year ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48881) - you deserved it (4292)
On 08/09/2011 at 10:50am - love - by aliixmaee - United States
Today, I finally noticed that my wife only shaves her bush when she goes on "business trips." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47772) - you deserved it (4094)
On 08/09/2011 at 12:59am - intimacy - by ksmith - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was getting my picture taken. The woman taking it told me to smile, so I did, showing my teeth. She said, "Please, be serious about this." Slightly offended, I smiled with my mouth closed. She then said, "If you can't be serious, we won't do this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24234) - you deserved it (1933)
On 08/09/2011 at 12:01am - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30754) - you deserved it (5123)
On 08/08/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by ApparentDrugAddict (woman) - United States
Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21563) - you deserved it (1798)
On 08/07/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by Paul - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my wife and I almost got a divorce over a game of Yahtzee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21643) - you deserved it (13073)
On 08/07/2011 at 5:44pm - love - by Username - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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