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xFMILYFEx

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xFMILYFEx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 May 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2862
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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xFMILYFEx's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over to my friend's house. After knocking on the door, I was greeted by her hairy, 300+ pounds father in his underwear. He then hugged me. FML

#17602503
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28145) - you deserved it (2797)

On 08/28/2011 at 4:27am - misc - by CooBerry3851 - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend decided to use glow-in-the-dark body paint to make an arrow on his stomach pointing down. I guess he thought he'd "spice up" the way he always demands a blow job before sex. FML

#17601968
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26463) - you deserved it (5745)

On 08/28/2011 at 2:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized my soon to be ex wife is stalking me online. Everytime I block her she creates a new profile. She left me 9 months ago. FML

#17600344
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28584) - you deserved it (2522)

On 08/28/2011 at 12:06am - love - by bubbashrek - United States

Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML

#17588509
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30369) - you deserved it (2788)

On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to a club. The only guy who asked me to dance introduced himself as "Bird Dog." FML

#17583731
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23355) - you deserved it (3168)

On 08/26/2011 at 3:35am - love - by EpicMayonnaise (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML

#17578977
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35775) - you deserved it (2576)

On 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my mother-in-law is house hunting in my town. There is a house for sale 2 doors down from me. In her price range. FML

#17574170
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29778) - you deserved it (2056)

On 08/25/2011 at 12:47am - misc - by momma6126 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, some blowhard on a motorcycle yelled at me for jaywalking, causing him to almost hit a dumpster. He picked up and threw an empty beer can at me when I started giggling at the sticker on the front of his helmet that said "If you can read this, I have lost my caravan." FML

#17572437
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8067) - you deserved it (22616)

On 08/24/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by josie345 - United States

Today, my ex-wife crashed my engagement party. FML

#17566039
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33330) - you deserved it (3590)

On 08/24/2011 at 4:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML

#17566014
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30518) - you deserved it (2803)

On 08/24/2011 at 4:03am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37010) - you deserved it (3257)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)

Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML

#17558329
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8919) - you deserved it (44355)

On 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by Kendal - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML

Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

#17544940
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8131) - you deserved it (51469)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:43am - health - by heheheh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought a Halloween costume for my cat. FML

#17544670
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8284) - you deserved it (36616)

On 08/22/2011 at 2:04am - animals - by vishuzzbabe77 - United States



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