About xAttackAttackx : Roses are red.
Violets are red.
Tulips are red.
Bushes are red.
Trees are red.
OH GOD, my gardens on fire!!
"Ricky Spanish"
I like giraffes and anything to do with clothes. I also have an idiotic brother; who I personally want to drown. I usually don't comment. That is all.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29415) - you deserved it (7939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version
Today, I realized the fastest way to wake up isn't from an alarm clock. It's from the warm, wet sensation of your old and senile cat peeing on you and your bed. I swear he was smiling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16759) - you deserved it (2069)
On 08/21/2012 at 9:04am - animals - by jenA - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer, until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18319) - you deserved it (1342)
On 08/20/2012 at 5:14am - misc - by scared to leave the house (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I climbed the tree in my backyard so I could cut off some stray branches. I ended up getting stuck, and instead of immediately getting help, my wife started laughing and recording me. The video is now circulating on Facebook, and my new nickname is "Hawkeye." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11611) - you deserved it (2082)
On 08/19/2012 at 2:09pm - misc - by spasticock (man) - Portugal (Setubal)
Today, I got into an argument with my girlfriend over how many sides a triangle has. I actually ended up drawing her a diagram. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18254) - you deserved it (2712)
On 08/19/2012 at 1:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, the whole family came over to celebrate my 18th birthday. My grandfather bought me a giant mathematics book. Apparently, he didn't want my 16 year old sister to be "jealous", so he got her the new iPad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24109) - you deserved it (1107)
On 08/18/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my family and I went to the movie theater. There weren't enough free seats near the front, so I sat a few rows back with my grandpa. He kept throwing our snacks at my parents' heads all through the movie. He claimed he'd been asleep the whole time, and I'm now grounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19519) - you deserved it (1620)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:39pm - misc - by wow, thanks (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15542) - you deserved it (1156)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:45pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML
I agree, your life sucks (17695) - you deserved it (1008)
On 08/17/2012 at 7:26am - animals - by byegeorge (woman) - United Kingdom (Hounslow)
Today, my boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushed to open it and jumped into his arms for a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15198) - you deserved it (4768)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:08am - love - by SquishFish - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I realized why my sister refuses to let me clean her side of the room. She's secretly been trying to revive dead ants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15935) - you deserved it (947)
On 08/16/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by scarredforlife - United States (Maryland)
Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22825) - you deserved it (2188)
On 08/08/2012 at 9:53am - work - by blakeintheoffice - United States
Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22613) - you deserved it (2784)
On 08/08/2012 at 4:02am - intimacy - by FMLMom - United States (California)
Today, as I sat down in the plane, I realized that for the next seven hours I would be sitting next to a priest who refused to stop praying aloud, and an old man who wanted to tell me the story of how the toothpick came to be. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16499) - you deserved it (1325)
On 08/02/2012 at 12:30pm - misc - by skrillexblewme - United States
Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29537) - you deserved it (2910) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/02/2012 at 9:00am - love - by opinaise - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Friday 24 May 2013
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