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wvni

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wvni

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 358
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About wvni : I am wvni. I an weird. I make new words and take things that are beyond things to other things, like beyond bull is ox. Now for a random thing. CAT VOMIT!

wvni's page activity

Visits<b>Solano2580</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 4:07am<b>daydreamer244</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 7:19pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 11:22pm<b>Mii99</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 1:24pm<b>anonymousjon</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:23pm<b>krxll</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:37am<b>madi_booth</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:19pm<b>cleo_ann</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 7:25pm<b>SickSilo34</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 7:28pm<b>han5301</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:28am<b>theriheldeal</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 1:36pm<b>tmd4L</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:46pm<b>Z3R0G5</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 6:46am

wvni's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of wvni's badges

wvni's favorite FMLs

Today, after emptying the dishwasher, I noticed something in the back by the drain. It looked like a turkey bone. Upon closer inspection, it was a mouse carcass. I have no idea how many loads of dishes have gone through with it in there. FML

#21283044
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11640) - you deserved it (1079)

On 10/22/2014 at 10:47am - animals - by MouserMan - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I tried to download some network-monitoring software for the office as I suspect that one of my staff has been constantly downloading torrents. It wouldn't download because someone was using all the bandwidth. FML

#21282944
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11908) - you deserved it (1025)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:09am - work - by Thewatcher (man) - Mauritius

Today, I fell asleep on the couch. My parents didn't wake me up, went to bed and set our burglar alarm. If I trip a motion sensor, a siren will go off. The motion sensor in my living room is pointed directly at me and I have to pee. It's been 2 hours. FML

#21282761
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15711) - you deserved it (1809)

On 10/21/2014 at 10:11pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

#21282367
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24985) - you deserved it (4997)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:49am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

#21282365
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26221) - you deserved it (2325)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:42am - misc - by youngboob (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML

#21282364
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22593) - you deserved it (2085)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:41am - kids - by Bald (man) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

Today, as my boyfriend left my house, I gave him a long, tight hug. So tight that he threw up. FML

Today, after months of job hunting, I started a new job in a deli. I've been a vegetarian since I was 13, but it was the only job I could find. Turns out, I'm allergic to the preservatives they use, as my fingers now resemble sausages. Guess it's time to start job hunting again. FML

Today, I was skating in the city when I slipped and fractured my arm. As I was lying in pain, a guy walked up to me, frisked my pocket and took my wallet. He then said: "It's nothing personal." FML

#21281599
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30620) - you deserved it (2521)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:50am - misc - by ColdStones (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I caught my 15-year-old son trying to roll catnip into a joint and smoke it. FML

#21281464
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26714) - you deserved it (3464)

On 10/19/2014 at 11:48pm - kids - by Bad Dad - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26003) - you deserved it (4123)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25017) - you deserved it (6399)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I started my job selling perfume in a department store. I decided to be creative and sprayed a little perfume towards the first person who walked by. She had an allergic reaction, and an ambulance had to be called. FML

#21281002
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17287) - you deserved it (33774)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:24am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML

#21280817
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29615) - you deserved it (5166)

On 10/19/2014 at 12:11am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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