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  • Number of visits : 85712
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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wtf's page activity

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wtf's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says "You're a bitch." He's 6. After asking where he heard that word, he responded with "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML

#112335
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (139707) - you deserved it (11095)

On 02/23/2009 at 7:51am - kids - by lifesucks4me - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I arrived at my parents house for dinner. When I got there, I noticed that they had gay pride flags hanging from the porch, and gay rights bumper stickers plastered to their cars. There was also a huge "We accept you, Nick" banner hanging from the garage. I'M NOT GAY! FML

#108815
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75961) - you deserved it (4503)

On 02/22/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after weeks of agonising, I told my best friend (who I am madly in love with) that I love her. She said: "me too, you're like a brother and a best girlfriend rolled into one!" FML

#102544
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47737) - you deserved it (3969)

On 02/22/2009 at 5:01am - love - by Reaper - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, after weeks of agonising, I told my best friend (who I am madly in love with) that I love her. She said: "me too, you're like a brother and a best girlfriend rolled into one!" FML

#102544
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47737) - you deserved it (3969)

On 02/22/2009 at 5:01am - love - by Reaper - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I returned from a half-month long trip to China with a group of friends. After throwing myself into my mother's arms and bursting into tears, she stops me to say 'Listen...these last couple of weeks have been some of the best I've ever had. Can we try to keep it like that?' FML

#89579
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38162) - you deserved it (3943)

On 02/20/2009 at 4:19pm - misc - by DuCkBuBbLeS (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I returned home from college and saw a framed picture of my parents and my younger sister on an elephant in an exotic jungle. I pointed to the picture and asked my mom, "Is this some photoshop job?" She responded, "No, we went to Thailand for a family trip, didn't we tell you?" FML

#86332
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68362) - you deserved it (3055)

On 02/20/2009 at 4:24am - misc - by OutoftheLoop (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
735 comments

I agree, your life sucks (762245) - you deserved it (81704)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML

#82135
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50696) - you deserved it (8115)

On 02/19/2009 at 8:39pm - love - by Skido (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML

#79689
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52364) - you deserved it (3249)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:47pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML

#79669
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48780) - you deserved it (4843)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by dpl (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took a massive dump at work and clogged the industrial toilet. Since I used the unisex one at the end of the hall, I watched my super hot coworker walk in after me. And then she ran out immediately. Everyone had seen me walk out before her. FML

#79663
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12994) - you deserved it (25750)

On 02/19/2009 at 4:44pm - work - by wow (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my professor, who was born without arms, asked somebody "need a hand?" There are over 300 students in that class and I was the only one laughing. FML

Today, I was marked absent from my math class because nobody in my class noticed I was there. FML

#77123
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48517) - you deserved it (4942)

On 02/19/2009 at 10:48am - misc - by Invisible (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I told a girl I liked her. She replied, "Don't". FML

#75697
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55400) - you deserved it (5195)

On 02/19/2009 at 2:08am - love - by grlks (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I told my long-distance girlfriend that I just could not handle the distance and we should just be friends. To which she responded, "What? You thought we were going out? Lol". FML

#71381
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39288) - you deserved it (7322)

On 02/18/2009 at 7:43pm - misc - by Fack. (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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