About wratty11 : I sure am completely, amazingly, absolutely, remarkably average
wratty11's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
wratty11's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to quickly back out of a Skype call between me and three coworkers because my fiancée came home from work in tears. When things had calmed down, I re-entered the call to find them unaware I had returned, saying how glad they were I had left because they all secretly despise me. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2015 at 3:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was kayaking with my family for my birthday, when we tipped over while going down a rocky cascade. My husband badly cut up his arm, and my car keys and my phone both went for a swim and never returned. Great birthday. FML
by KeysToHappiness / 08/16/2015 at 8:39am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to go to a boring, never-ending "sensitivity training" session, all because my douchebag coworker filed a complaint against me last week after I apologized for being tardy. Apparently I was insulting people with mental disorders. Or as she put it, "differently-abled" people. FML
by tumblrinas_at_work / 05/02/2015 at 4:04am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML
by whoreticulturalist / 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm / United Kingdom (Plymouth) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:59am / United States / Animals
Today, I came out to my parents. I don't really fit any stereotype, I'm just an average guy who happens to be into guys. Ten minutes later, I overheard my mother say to my step-dad, "Should we redecorate his room pink?" FML
by ohai95 / 08/07/2012 at 8:11pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 4:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love
Today, I called in to my girlfriend's favorite radio station to propose. After spending what seemed like an eternity telling her how much I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her, she took a deep breath, said, "How about no?" and hung up. FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2012 at 3:50pm / United States / Love
by a chick in California / 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by nickthetank / 12/31/2011 at 4:21am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
by sydysyd / 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML
by Anonymous / 11/21/2010 at 3:01am / Mexico (Morelos) / Intimacy
by pst / 11/20/2010 at 8:06pm / South Africa (Western Cape) / Intimacy
by nevergonnatrust / 11/18/2010 at 4:23am / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 8:42pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…