About woolymittens : Hmm stalking my page are we? Haha, kidding. :)
Um there isn't really much to say about me to be honest, I'm a quiet person, shy, awkward... I love to draw and read books and listen to music! I'm your average teenager with a crazy family really. :P
Oh and I obviously love fml! It's so addictive. :)
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Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44808) - you deserved it (2505)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44808) - you deserved it (2505)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my ex-boyfriend's attempt to win me back involved standing at the bottom of my apartment building with two airhorns, blasting them and shouting. And for some reason, singing "Sweet Caroline", even though that's not my name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20147) - you deserved it (2600)
On 07/31/2011 at 11:09pm - love - by notsomuch (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, while working at Subway, a man ordered a sub with avocado. When I told him it was no longer available, he screamed, spit in my face and ran out, pushing over an innocent bystander in the process. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25828) - you deserved it (2192)
On 07/16/2011 at 10:46pm - work - by sandwichmaker - United States (Illinois)
Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked passed my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28562) - you deserved it (2233)
On 07/08/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by chumleevil - United States (Maine)
Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33120) - you deserved it (4966)
On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)
Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34714) - you deserved it (1941)
On 07/03/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by beablue18 - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)
Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43997) - you deserved it (3610)
On 06/30/2011 at 3:24am - misc - by asianlover (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on for the first time. Just as I was about to climax, I spotted my greatest fear, a big wasp, only a few inches away from me. I shuddered and made a very unmanly orgasm wail. She now refuses to have sex because she says I "turned her off forever". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31871) - you deserved it (8156)
On 06/07/2011 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Punk (man) - United States
Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40292) - you deserved it (14075)
On 05/11/2011 at 1:34pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28189) - you deserved it (2459)
On 04/26/2011 at 3:19pm - misc - by rockyrocket (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28189) - you deserved it (2459)
On 04/26/2011 at 3:19pm - misc - by rockyrocket (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my husband got out of the shower, came downstairs naked screaming ''EMBRACE THE HARDNESS!!'' Little did he know, my step mother was sitting right there at the kitchen table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37593) - you deserved it (4306)
On 04/26/2011 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by Scarlett - United States (Washington)
Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26147) - you deserved it (8896)
On 04/24/2011 at 9:10pm - misc - by woahitbechels - United States (Tennessee)
Today, while trying on clothes in Macy's, someone decided to throw some shoes over the wall and into my changing stall. I now have a black eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22848) - you deserved it (2018)
On 04/23/2011 at 2:12am - health - by rhartnett11 - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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