Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

woofer

Search for a member

woofer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10813
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

woofer's last visitors

yer_mawlizwriteslovewhiteyjesslackszazz

woofer's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

woofer's favorite FMLs

Today, at 4 AM, I locked myself out of my apartment. After calling friends in vain, I decided to just sit on the doorstep and wait for someone to come in. I sat for 10 minutes before a homeless man insisted threateningly that I move. I was kicked off my own front doorstep by a homeless man. FML

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML

#966989
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48545) - you deserved it (17268)

On 04/14/2009 at 10:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said there was someone else, and that he has been in love with her for a while. Turns out, the new girl was his online video game character. I got dumped for a video game. FML

#637749
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88807) - you deserved it (8346)

On 03/27/2009 at 1:12am - love - by w00tz (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
515 comments

I agree, your life sucks (227061) - you deserved it (29232)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I drunk dialed my mom and told her I was so high and drunk that I thought the KGB was coming after me. When I woke up this morning, my mom told me that she's no longer paying for college. FML

#90754
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16344) - you deserved it (109213)

On 02/20/2009 at 6:42pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML

#1817
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21159) - you deserved it (5039)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by mainche - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML

#1705
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26536) - you deserved it (1664)

On 01/19/2009 at 6:12am - love - by f'ed_over - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML

#1114
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15395) - you deserved it (1481)

On 01/14/2009 at 10:32am - love - by poisonhand - United States (Michigan)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: