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About wolfshield101 : You can drink an UGLY girl pretty, but you can't drink a FAT girl skinny!
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend told me "don't worry, someday you'll be mature as well." By this, he meant that I will be willing to have sex with him in public. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20309) - you deserved it (3081)
On 10/15/2010 at 1:13am - intimacy - by anouk05 (woman) - Switzerland (Vaud)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27607) - you deserved it (15702)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, I found out that my parents like rough sex. I found the whip and handcuffs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21303) - you deserved it (3748)
On 10/08/2010 at 11:29pm - intimacy - by mster233 (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my friends took me to a strip club for my 25th birthday. I went onstage with 5 dollars in my mouth to tip the dancer. She then took off my belt and pants and spanked me 25 times with the buckle end of the belt. I paid a stripper 5 dollars to whoop my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5929) - you deserved it (22393)
On 10/06/2010 at 7:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6880) - you deserved it (38056)
On 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I found out that my "I don't believe in pre-marital sex" boyfriend is the father of my younger sister's newborn baby. After four years of being in a serious, but sexless, relationship, I am now single, horny, and an aunt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42817) - you deserved it (4140)
On 10/04/2010 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I got a text from my ex: "I miss you." I was happy to hear this, so I replied "Really?" I got in return "Not really, I'm just really horny and thinking of you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21507) - you deserved it (3670)
On 10/02/2010 at 2:25am - intimacy - by rawr101 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I put an anonymous note under my neighbour's door asking them to not have sex so loudly during the day. Since then, I haven't heard any sex. Unfortunately, I have heard a woman crying loudly because she just found out about her husband's affair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34500) - you deserved it (7473)
On 09/22/2010 at 3:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, I discovered that if I put my ankles on my boyfriends shoulders while we are having sex, I will pee myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23110) - you deserved it (9340)
On 09/22/2010 at 1:37am - intimacy - by noname - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I bought a new pack of "feminine wipes" on my way over to my boyfriend's house after a long day of work. He saw them in my purse and sweetly told me I shouldn't be so self conscious. Later on, when he was going down on me, he said, "I take back what I said earlier." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20766) - you deserved it (6233)
On 09/18/2010 at 8:15pm - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had a nice, open chat with my mother. I accidentally let slip that I'm a nymphomaniac. She accidentally let slip that my dad is bad in bed. I don't think either of us will be chatting so openly for awhile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15614) - you deserved it (6287)
On 09/12/2010 at 12:07am - intimacy - by ewmomew (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked in on my mom taking nude pictures of herself in the kitchen, with only a Santa hat on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33179) - you deserved it (3022)
On 09/10/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by meikd423 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was lying on my bed with my boyfriend. I didn't really want to have sex so I told him I would if he really wanted too, but I wouldn't enjoy it. He then started to undo my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9338) - you deserved it (35430)
On 09/06/2010 at 8:50am - intimacy - by sad-sexed (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18733) - you deserved it (2744)
On 09/02/2010 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by anonymous.. (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43552) - you deserved it (3000)
On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)
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