[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

wish

Search for a member

wish
  • Town/Country : Riverdale, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 February 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 769
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About wish : Hmm, about me let's see, I'm supa laid back 24/7. I just love life, as long as I'm breathin I have nothin 2 complain about....On a different note I eat sleep and breathe music. Mostly Rap and Metal(yeah I'm def not ur average black dude lol). I've been playin guitar for about a year now. I actually just uploaded a vid on youtube of me playin. Check that shit out and tell me what u think www.youtube.com/user/wishj4

wish's last visitors

FreezesugarnspiceeApparatus333larissanicoleeZebrasofa13zombieteefJustSoLostjennay8288ILIEKGIRLS

wish's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

wish's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML

#12082057 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (12075) - you deserved it (17145)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:50am - health - by breathexali (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that if you slip on ice, imitating Mario from Super Mario Bros when he attempts to stop himself slipping, won't work in real life. I now have a broken nose, as well as a blood trail running from my driveway into my kitchen. FML

#7568710 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (5054) - you deserved it (17683)

On 01/25/2010 at 1:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML

#7509871 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (5813) - you deserved it (23294)

On 01/22/2010 at 10:16pm - kids - by Chan (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while in the waiting room at the chiropractor's office, I thought I'd be sexy and flash my boyfriend. Forgetting that my iPhone was in the front pocket of my hoodie, I lifted it quickly and hit myself in the mouth. Now I have a fat bloody lip and a boyfriend who can't stop laughing. FML

#7469171 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (4389) - you deserved it (28697)

On 01/21/2010 at 2:31am - intimacy - by im_radd (woman) - United States

Today, I was given a ticket for running a red light. The reason? I was moving out of the way of an ambulance. The police officer watched it go by. FML

#7434371 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (22218) - you deserved it (1612)

On 01/19/2010 at 8:20am - misc - by Samaritan (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of 'Fight Club'. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (18600) - you deserved it (8590)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML

#6594028 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (6903) - you deserved it (19850)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by wobbles (man) - United States (California)

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

#2874076 (252)

I agree, your life sucks (31045) - you deserved it (44089)

On 06/14/2009 at 12:14am - intimacy - by BarbieKen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at a 21st birthday party. It got to the bit where they blow out the candles and the girl hosting blew out her candles. While she was blowing I whispered to the fella next to me, "That's not the only thing she'll be blowing tonight". The guy next to me was her dad. FML

#2713232 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (10497) - you deserved it (62451)

On 06/08/2009 at 6:39am - intimacy - by baller (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, in an effort to seduce my husband, I laid in bed caressing myself. He walked in, looked at me, and said "is the ground beef in the freezer still good?" and when I answered "yes," he turned and walked out of the room. FML

#2693360 (220)

I agree, your life sucks (44015) - you deserved it (4258)

On 06/07/2009 at 3:14pm - misc - by szinna - United States (Nevada)

Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML

#2406787 (297)

I agree, your life sucks (15853) - you deserved it (32893)

On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

#2275729 (720)

I agree, your life sucks (164016) - you deserved it (74972)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver decided to spit into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML

#2267007 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (41642) - you deserved it (2607)

On 05/25/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by hahahah111 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my parents joined the mile high club. While I was on the plane. FML

#2257216 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (55283) - you deserved it (3154)

On 05/24/2009 at 10:17pm - intimacy - by boardman (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to the casino. I used my last $5 on a slot machine. When the machine started lighting up, saying I had just won $20,000, I excitedly began jumping and screaming. As people crowded around me, the casino lady explained it was 20,000 credits, not dollars. I had only won $20. FML

#2187071 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (31446) - you deserved it (12149)

On 05/22/2009 at 6:12pm - money - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)