Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

wiretapped

Search for a member

wiretapped

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 600
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

wiretapped's page activity

Visits<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 12:40am<b>Lykaios_Avery</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:40pm<b>ignorant4life</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:28pm<b>Sweet_Meli</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 10:20pm<b>anonymouse75</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:23pm<b>hockeychick27</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:09pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 11:36pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 9:00am

wiretapped's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of wiretapped's badges

wiretapped's favorite FMLs

Today, the girl I like sent me a nude photo of herself. Being a photographer, all I could think about was how grainy the photo was, and the various ways it could be fixed. FML

#20889340
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43322) - you deserved it (19284)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML

#20889286
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19110) - you deserved it (33997)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was struggling to move a large bookshelf downstairs. Mid-way down, the weight became too much for me and I desperately yelled to my dad for help. He stood at the top of the stairs and said, "Cash or broken bones. How much's it worth, son?" I'm now £50 poorer. FML

#20889249
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38015) - you deserved it (3579)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:20pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I walked in on my daughter shaving the testicles of her boyfriend, who had apparently snuck in through her window. FML

#20888905
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53086) - you deserved it (5377)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by disappointed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought it would be cool to hit a basketball with a baseball bat. Ended up in the ER with seven stitches. FML

#20888878
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18942) - you deserved it (43568)

On 09/20/2013 at 11:33am - misc - by BabeRuth (man) - United States

Today, I bumped into a really cute guy I know. I stuttered and floundered, before saying, "Hi, it's me, Megan Thomas." My surname isn't Thomas, but his is. FML

#20888741
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46422) - you deserved it (8254)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:23am - love - by hoolagirl4422 (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, my husband wanted me to "spice up" our sex life. I guess he didn't count on me vomiting when he came in my mouth. We won't be getting intimate again for a long, long time now. FML

#20888582
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47556) - you deserved it (10589)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was at work at Krispy Kreme for national "talk like a pirate" day. If you dressed like a pirate you'd get a free dozen donuts. A man came in with just an eyepatch on. Thinking he was trying to get a free dozen, I told him he needed to try harder. Turned out the eyepatch was real. FML

#20888238
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44141) - you deserved it (12190)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:47pm - work - by Jamie - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to put up with a student who stubbornly insisted that King Solomon was, in fact, a Pokémon. FML

Today, I shaved my face after several months of growth. This would be OK if my 4-year-old daughter would still talk to me. Apparently she doesn't recognise me, and I'm scary. FML

#20887990
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41014) - you deserved it (3443)

On 09/19/2013 at 5:18pm - kids - by Smoothskin (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

#20887758
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37669) - you deserved it (2849)

On 09/19/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my enjoyment of popping bubble wrap was yet again ruined by my excessive OCD tendencies. FML

#20887677
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34147) - you deserved it (5163)

On 09/19/2013 at 11:18am - health - by BarryShitpeas - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, a street preacher got on my metro car and gave a long, loud speech about how we sinful, polluted congressional staffers must inform our bosses that choosing a homosexual lifestyle was like trading your soul for soup. We got stuck in a tunnel for thirty minutes. FML

#20887597
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36232) - you deserved it (3485)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by CapitolSouthSux (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

#20887524
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51033) - you deserved it (4959)

On 09/19/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by monkey (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my English teacher handed back my creative story assignment with a 74% on it. Apparently, she docked 10% because I had an unrealistic, overly dramatic plot line. That plot line was based on my life. FML

#20887417
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43175) - you deserved it (3772)

On 09/19/2013 at 2:15am - work - by Sua - Canada (Alberta)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: