wiretapped

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wiretapped

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1778
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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wiretapped's page activity

Visits<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 12:40am<b>Lykaios_Avery</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:40pm<b>ignorant4life</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:28pm<b>Sweet_Meli</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 10:20pm<b>anonymouse75</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:23pm<b>hockeychick27</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:09pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 11:36pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 9:00am

wiretapped's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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wiretapped's favorite FMLs

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

by :( / 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, my wife made me go with her to dinner with her parents, despite their long-standing hatred of me. Later on, my mother-in-law muttered to me, "I made yours special for ya", smirked, then made a show of scratching at her butt-crack. FML

by ouharguohargssdf / 09/28/2013 at 5:01pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:25pm / Serbia / Love

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. We are on a cruise together. She has already found another room to sleep in. FML

by Christian / 09/28/2013 at 11:21am / United States / Love

Today, I found out this girl I had sex with lied to me. They weren't razor burn bumps. And I now have them. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 7:44am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:08am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my insane war veteran great-uncle punched me in the throat for not laughing hard enough at his stupid joke. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

by SerenityJ / 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my boss' son is training to take over my job as head translator, after having convinced his dad that he's fluent in Spanish, and that my skills suck. I soon walked in on him using Google Translate on a legal document. My boss refuses to believe me. FML

by anahira6 / 09/27/2013 at 3:41pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was cleaning up litter from the street, when a guy asked who I work for. I said nobody and that I was just doing some community service. Before I could clarify that it was voluntary community service, he called me a "piece of shit delinquent", spat on me, and walked off. FML

by sigh / 09/27/2013 at 3:01pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

by propose_you_freakin_coward / 09/27/2013 at 8:51am / Singapore / Love

Today, my mum dismissed my diagnosed schizophrenia as "too much time with those earphones in". FML

by awkwardology / 09/27/2013 at 3:56am / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML

by drinkdrankdrunk / 09/27/2013 at 3:33am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I found out that my controlling, verbally abusive ex-boyfriend from nearly four years ago is still obsessed with me. Apparently, he's told everyone back home that he and I are getting married as soon as I finish college. We haven't spoken in over two years. FML

by kitkat3308 / 09/27/2013 at 2:20am / United States / Love