Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

wiretapped

Search for a member

wiretapped

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 593
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

wiretapped's page activity

Visits<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 12:40am<b>Lykaios_Avery</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:40pm<b>ignorant4life</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:28pm<b>Sweet_Meli</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 10:20pm<b>anonymouse75</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:23pm<b>hockeychick27</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:09pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 11:36pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 9:00am

wiretapped's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of wiretapped's badges

wiretapped's favorite FMLs

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

#20899471
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61523) - you deserved it (7220)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by :( (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my wife made me go with her to dinner with her parents, despite their long-standing hatred of me. Later on, my mother-in-law muttered to me, "I made yours special for ya", smirked, then made a show of scratching at her butt-crack. FML

#20899435
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36510) - you deserved it (2512)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:01pm - misc - by ouharguohargssdf (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

#20899091
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44770) - you deserved it (3854)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Serbia

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. We are on a cruise together. She has already found another room to sleep in. FML

#20899028
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48687) - you deserved it (3177)

On 09/28/2013 at 11:21am - love - by Christian (man) - United States

Today, I found out this girl I had sex with lied to me. They weren't razor burn bumps. And I now have them. FML

#20898893
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56748) - you deserved it (36429)

On 09/28/2013 at 7:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

#20898640
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59112) - you deserved it (3983)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my insane war veteran great-uncle punched me in the throat for not laughing hard enough at his stupid joke. FML

#20898629
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39421) - you deserved it (4480)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66797) - you deserved it (4063)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48754) - you deserved it (6373)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss' son is training to take over my job as head translator, after having convinced his dad that he's fluent in Spanish, and that my skills suck. I soon walked in on him using Google Translate on a legal document. My boss refuses to believe me. FML

#20898132
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44300) - you deserved it (2643)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:41pm - work - by anahira6 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was cleaning up litter from the street, when a guy asked who I work for. I said nobody and that I was just doing some community service. Before I could clarify that it was voluntary community service, he called me a "piece of shit delinquent", spat on me, and walked off. FML

#20898099
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39816) - you deserved it (2905)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:01pm - misc - by sigh (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML

#20897826
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42110) - you deserved it (6091)

On 09/27/2013 at 8:51am - love - by propose_you_freakin_coward (man) - Singapore

Today, my mum dismissed my diagnosed schizophrenia as "too much time with those earphones in". FML

#20897726
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38850) - you deserved it (3060)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:56am - health - by awkwardology - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML

#20897714
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39102) - you deserved it (16184)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:33am - love - by drinkdrankdrunk (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my controlling, verbally abusive ex-boyfriend from nearly four years ago is still obsessed with me. Apparently, he's told everyone back home that he and I are getting married as soon as I finish college. We haven't spoken in over two years. FML

#20897674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42601) - you deserved it (2688)

On 09/27/2013 at 2:20am - love - by kitkat3308 - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: