About winterpony : I like cats.
About winterpony : I like cats.
winterpony's FML badges
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
winterpony's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom called me an asshole. She was embarrassed when she saw that a visiting family member had overheard, and tried to cover it up with, "Honey, you are a casserole! You are just delicious, any guy is gonna want you sweetie!" She honestly thought this would work. FML
by Agirl / 10/25/2012 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by jesushelpme / 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, I bought professional hair clippers to shave down below, thinking it would be safer than using a razor. Let's just say the bathroom now looks like a murder scene, and it's going to be a while before I have sex again. FML
by Anonymous / 10/20/2012 at 12:03am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by L / 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy
Today, my crush and I were volunteering at a local farm. He confessed to me that I'm one of the most beautiful girls he's ever seen. Just as he leaned in to kiss me, I lost my footing and fell into a pile of horse shit. He just stood there, pointing and laughing. FML
by FarmerGirl / 10/09/2012 at 2:43pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love
Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML
by Anonymous / 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health
Today, after months of believing my house is haunted, and years of being scared of the dark, I finally had to admit to myself that the only way I can go to the bathroom in the middle of the night is if my cat follows me and sits outside the door. I'm 23. FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2012 at 8:37pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML
by bruisedego31 / 09/12/2012 at 5:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by TheNaturalOrderofThingsSucks / 09/10/2012 at 11:13pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I was in a terrific mood after finding a bouquet of beautiful flowers on my doorstep when I came home. That is, until I recognised the handwriting of my "secret admirer" was the same as my mother's. FML
by mfnfhdjdjddjsjfn / 09/03/2012 at 4:39am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by alix / 08/24/2012 at 11:45am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Animals
by Anonymous / 08/01/2012 at 7:31pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals
Today, in a drunken, depressed state I thought I heard my deceased mother trying to make contact with me from beyond the grave. It took me a moment to realise that the soft voice was from the music my neighbours were playing. FML
by hearingthings / 06/25/2012 at 10:59pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML
by Anonymous / 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy
Today, I drove my drunk sister home after a wild night of partying. She did not go to bed as I expected; instead, she laid in the bathtub and cried every time I left her. Now it's 3AM, and she's using her bra as a lasso for various objects in the room. The best part is I work in 4 hours. FML
by eddie818 / 06/10/2012 at 3:54am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to… Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying on one of my little black dresses and heels. He wanted to… Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news:…