About winterforever97 : Twitter- T-i-d-e-s
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Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.
Today, I was getting a spray tan and realized I didn't have a hair tie, so I used a thong instead. I lost track of time and realized I needed to go pick up my daughter. I threw on my clothes, drove to pick her up, went to the store, and went for ice cream... thong still in my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9986) - you deserved it (30535)
On 01/02/2013 at 12:33pm - health - by Embarrassed - United States
Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7059) - you deserved it (30094)
On 01/02/2013 at 10:01am - misc - by AmberHavoc - United Kingdom
Today, I discovered that if I turn my shower off for a minute, then back on again, the water comes out scalding hot. I discovered that while the showerhead was pointed directly at my genitals. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23990) - you deserved it (7966)
On 01/01/2013 at 2:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I woke up to a small fire on my roof, burning up small twigs and branches. The cause? Last night, I threw a sparkling firecracker up very high, only to have it blown onto my roof by the wind. It's going to take $2,000 to fix the damage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6835) - you deserved it (34397)
On 01/01/2013 at 1:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17124) - you deserved it (1747)
On 11/24/2012 at 11:35am - misc - by lobstercola - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was nicknamed "Sandman." Not after the bad-ass Spider Man villain but rather because my personality is so boring it puts people to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11668) - you deserved it (2520)
On 11/22/2012 at 2:25am - misc - by zzz - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19533) - you deserved it (1474)
On 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm - misc - by vanillatwilight2 (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my older brother thought it would be hilarious to sneak up and scare me in the grocery aisle at the store. I screamed and jumped, knocking half the shelf's contents all over the floor. We're now banned from the only grocery store in town. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15524) - you deserved it (1738)
On 11/17/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by sarahhbear - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend learned how to somersault. He now thinks that he's a ninja and somersaults into every room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13936) - you deserved it (3034)
On 10/07/2012 at 10:20am - love - by justabitembarrassed - United States (Ohio)
Today, my mom decided to subtly bring up her desire for grandchildren. "You really need a girlfriend. I'm surprised you don't have a crippling case of Carpal Tunnel by now." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12349) - you deserved it (1769)
On 10/05/2012 at 1:59am - misc - by alittlepersonal (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my mom screeched at me about my pillowcase being dirty and finished off one long rant with an irate "Who raised you to be such a pig?" Her anger multiplied by ten when I asked if it was a trick question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14651) - you deserved it (4968)
On 10/02/2012 at 6:29am - misc - by kira (woman) - United States
Today, I finally realized how stupid I am, when I answered a question correctly in class and my teacher started clapping and cheering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14417) - you deserved it (2672)
On 10/01/2012 at 2:24pm - misc - by dumbgirl4lyf (woman) - Ireland (Monaghan)
Today, it was my uncle's funeral. I wasn't very close with him, but I still wanted to be respectful. My boyfriend, being the jackass that he is, was singing the Spider Pig song from The Simpsons under his breath while making his fingers walk up my leg, trying to get under my skirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17029) - you deserved it (4634)
On 10/01/2012 at 12:23am - love - by SorryUncleTommy (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I got yelled at for providing horrible customer service, in a store I don't even work for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17919) - you deserved it (1293)
On 09/30/2012 at 1:32am - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am beyond terrified. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16782) - you deserved it (1175)
On 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Monday 17 June 2013
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