Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

wingedtoad

Search for a member

wingedtoad

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4507
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

wingedtoad's page activity

Visits<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:29am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 9:39am<b>scottyboy417</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 3:26am<b>mat_sib</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 5:35pm<b>natyemi15</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 2:02pm<b>surranger</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 9:05pm<b>Remehdy</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 3:03am<b>Seabiscuit218</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 3:46pm<b>NegativeAttitude</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 8:34pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 9:40pm<b>manchesterUK</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:32am<b>xRake</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:14am<b>minioncandy</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:20pm<b>NinjaZombieV</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 11:34pm<b>Journiexo</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 3:36pm<b>Elgaard</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 3:32am<b>jennlody</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 10:59pm<b>allison12197</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:43pm

Liked!<b>Seabiscuit218</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 9:46pm

wingedtoad's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

wingedtoad's favorite FMLs

Today, I was wearing a skirt, and running towards a closing elevator, making it just in time. As soon as I ran in, my pad fell out of my underwear and onto the floor. There were 6 other people in the elevator. I picked it up before I realized I had nowhere to put it, so I held it. For 18 floors. FML

#4201501
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59558) - you deserved it (9542)

On 08/01/2009 at 4:15am - misc - by Alice (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was 'A man running'. I didn't even get an apology. FML

#4196733
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56343) - you deserved it (2355)

On 08/01/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mum deleted my college research assignment on rape because the subject was too vulgar. I had worked on it for the past month and it was worth 50% of my grade. It's due tomorrow. FML

#4192462
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63050) - you deserved it (4015)

On 07/31/2009 at 9:51pm - work - by mandy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at the doctors getting a pap smear and she asked if it was alright if a doctor in training could come in to observe. I was already laying on the table with my feet in the stirups so everything was in plain sight. When the man came in to observe I looked up to see my brother in law. FML

#4161962
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48253) - you deserved it (2506)

On 07/30/2009 at 1:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML

#4157667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41054) - you deserved it (26521)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:21am - intimacy - by verysadasian (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was downtown with my boyfriend around Noon when we walked past a few guys who shouted out to me "You're the most beautiful girl we've seen all day". My boyfriend's response was "It's still early." FML

#4156114
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47881) - you deserved it (4018)

On 07/30/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by epicc1584 - United States (Maryland) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML

#4156027
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53505) - you deserved it (3158)

On 07/30/2009 at 7:34am - kids - by Herdad (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was at work doing phone computer support helping a woman with her computer. I asked her to close all her open windows. She deleted all the important company documents in the open folder instead. I got fired because "close windows" and "delete" have become "too technical" for users. FML

#4133060
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50746) - you deserved it (2275)

On 07/29/2009 at 12:34pm - work - by pixelbaker (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was trying on some shoes when I felt the heels break underneath me. Not only did they cost two paychecks worth, but as I was leaving I heard the sales girl say that "we really should have a weight limit for who can try on our products." FML

#4122629
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40534) - you deserved it (18369)

On 07/29/2009 at 12:03am - money - by BigFoot (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was supposed to hear back from a major scholarship competition. After months of waiting, during which my parents were convinced I had won, I discovered that my entry had never been received. Apparently the woman I had confirmed with had had a long day, and lied so that she could go home. FML

#4113749
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58175) - you deserved it (2451)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a friend asked me if I could help him set up the stage for his wedding. Feeling honored that he considered me a close enough friend to aid him on his special day, I agreed to help. Turns out we aren't so close. I was asked to leave after I was done because I hadn't actually been invited. FML

#4099565
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48615) - you deserved it (2361)

On 07/28/2009 at 2:34am - misc - by partypooper (man) - United States (California)

Today, while spray painting a rocking horse for my kids I left the can outside in the sun. When I picked it up it was hot to the touch and I dropped it. It exploded on impact and now I am more blue than the rocking horse. FML

#4083142
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37347) - you deserved it (19821)

On 07/27/2009 at 4:08pm - animals - by usafprog (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

#4081805
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61942) - you deserved it (3125)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

#4070299
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52191) - you deserved it (14233)

On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: