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wingedtoad

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wingedtoad

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  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 4202
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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wingedtoad's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to see a play. I'm pregnant, so I always need to pee. At intermission, I ran to use the bathroom, but there was a really long line. I asked the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She responded, "You don't look pregnant!", and lectured me about lying while I peed my pants. FML

#6737603
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37346) - you deserved it (2546)

On 12/13/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by justine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

#6712384
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13841) - you deserved it (34890)

On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to take a test that's required to pass the class. The test administor told us that those of us who were wearing hoodies would have to take them off. I would have taken mine off, but I was only wearing a bra underneath. There's no other days I can reschedule the test. FML

#6595557
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31035) - you deserved it (12580)

On 12/04/2009 at 2:55am - misc - by wearashirt (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML

#6505473
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27755) - you deserved it (6973)

On 11/29/2009 at 12:16am - love - by random123 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had six friends round for pizza. When I went to answer the door to the delivery, my friends turned off the lights and pretended they weren't there when I shouted for help carrying all the food. Not only does the cute delivery guy think I'm greedy, but also that I have imaginary friends. FML

#6464238
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25816) - you deserved it (3101)

On 11/26/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by has-evil-friends (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I went to drive my mom's car for a change. It wouldn't start, so I open the hood. Someone had stolen the battery. I go to start my own car so I can drive to the police station to report the theft, and discover someone siphoned off my gas. FML

#6439470
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25803) - you deserved it (1738)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by bummer (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that some men think it's ok to clip their fingernails, at the table, in a restaurant, on a first date. FML

#6420618
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36685) - you deserved it (2569)

On 11/23/2009 at 5:13am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found my son's dead goldfish. Apparently, when it died he didn't flush it. Instead he placed it in one of my socks, placed that sock in a jar, and set the jar in the back of my closet. The fish has been dead for over a month. FML

#6417968
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28539) - you deserved it (2380)

On 11/23/2009 at 2:31am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my friend called me freaking out because of an online pregnancy test. She was scared because she had no idea that she was pregnant, let alone having a fifteen pound baby. The website is a joke. She goes to an Ivy League school, and I couldn't even get into community college. FML

#6416233
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32571) - you deserved it (3550)

On 11/23/2009 at 12:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa masturbating, with a message that said he wished me a white Christmas. FML

#6401581
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20572) - you deserved it (3723)

On 11/22/2009 at 4:15am - intimacy - by lonewolf2701 - United States

Today, as I was yelled at by a middle school teacher in front of 30 6th graders for breaking the rule of "no cell phones in school." Luckily, I escaped being sent to the office after explaining I'm a 21 year old college student doing student teaching observations, not a middle schooler. FML

#6379365
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29163) - you deserved it (4442)

On 11/20/2009 at 12:24pm - misc - by NotInMiddleSchool (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend came over to celebrate our anniversary. He had a card written in crayon with my name spelled wrong, and a basket I had seen his mother throw in the trash filled with flower petals ripped from my mom's garden. Our anniversary was 3 days ago. FML

#6326207
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37015) - you deserved it (5143)

On 11/16/2009 at 1:12pm - love - by TLT (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

#6316031
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58869) - you deserved it (3600)

On 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, at 2 in the morning, a noisy work crew started up in the parking lot next to my apartment. What were they doing at that ungodly hour? Installing a light that now shines right into my window. FML

#6313521
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27063) - you deserved it (1658)

On 11/15/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by theropod (man) - United States (Colorado)



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