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wingedtoad

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wingedtoad

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4472
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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wingedtoad's page activity

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Liked!<b>Seabiscuit218</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 9:46pm

wingedtoad's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

wingedtoad's favorite FMLs

Today, I was perusing my mom's Facebook. I noticed she has an album of pictures for each member of the family, except me. The dog has an album. FML

#8790024
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24039) - you deserved it (2301)

On 03/03/2010 at 12:08am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23199) - you deserved it (7537)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got back home and my hamster was dead. I left notes two weeks ago everywhere to remind my parents to feed it while I was overseas. Apparently, my parents even didn't realize I was gone. FML

#8681991
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27474) - you deserved it (2312)

On 02/27/2010 at 2:37am - animals - by lovingsnow (woman) - Singapore

Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML

#8472938
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9725) - you deserved it (35024)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:58am - misc - by Rach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I went to my hair dresser to get my haircut. When she asked me what I wanted, I told her "the usual". She confused me with another customer and gave me a mullet. FML

#8364767
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12481) - you deserved it (27789)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - misc - by Craig (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a really sweet poem that he wrote for me. I think it was secondhand - the first letter of each verse spelled his ex girlfriend's name. FML

#8347033
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27358) - you deserved it (1989)

On 02/16/2010 at 7:00pm - love - by blaze (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend of two years said he would finally take me somewhere romantic. I spent my day at a Star Wars convention. FML

#7936771
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25075) - you deserved it (6258)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:29pm - love - by cherrycokeee - Sent from mobile version

Today, I told my girlfriend's father that I wanted to talk about his daughter. I then went on to tell him I was thinking about 'popping the cherry', instead of 'popping the question'. FML

#7883509
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19475) - you deserved it (11346)

On 02/04/2010 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by stoopidpoop (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I received a detention because I threw up on the school nurse who wasn't going to send me home. According to her, stomach ulcers are not a true health issue, so there's no reason to leave. FML

#7814499
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38054) - you deserved it (1909)

On 02/02/2010 at 1:38pm - misc - by mollymaykitty - Sent from mobile version

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML

#7298942
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27816) - you deserved it (2081)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:23pm - misc - by MattVh (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML

#7293990
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25505) - you deserved it (8127)

On 01/12/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by cold-n-stinky (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friends let me win at strip poker so I wouldn't take off my clothes. FML

#7293209
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (5769)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:42am - misc - by Absent - France

Today, my daughter learned that if she rips a toy out of its package in front of a store employee, mommy will be forced to buy it. She now has two new toys today. FML

#7273590
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30968) - you deserved it (9776)

On 01/11/2010 at 3:09am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was very sick with a stomach virus, so I went to the only doctor's office open on Sundays. Even though I was feeling like a pile of shit, I waited for a woman who was walking in behind me to hold the door open for her. She was the last patient they could take for the day. FML

#7270960
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30409) - you deserved it (2706)

On 01/11/2010 at 12:19am - health - by Gentleman (man) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I had to clean my house to hide the evidence of the party I threw last night. I attempted to clean the puke stain on my carpet while still drunk. I didn't realize until this morning that the All Purpose cleaner I used was actually All Purpose Adhesive. The evidence is now glued to my carpet. FML

#7263195
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5796) - you deserved it (38966)

On 01/10/2010 at 7:21pm - misc - by Lady (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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