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will5801

Offline (the 10/23/2014 at 8:13pm) | Search for a member

will5801

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  • Number of visits : 79
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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will5801's favorite FMLs

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30216) - you deserved it (4763)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

#21270163
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43213) - you deserved it (3649)

On 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by oncehipjr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating a hot fudge sundae and I complained that the fudge was at the very bottom and I couldn't reach it with my spoon. My husband muttered "Fat girl problems." FML

#21260102
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36544) - you deserved it (11238)

On 09/17/2014 at 4:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, some assface hacked my recently deceased friend's Facebook account. The person changed my friend's location to "Hell", then posted a status saying how hot the weather was, and replied "I wish :'(" to someone who'd said my friend was in a better place now. FML

#21257037
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44088) - you deserved it (3000)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:11pm - misc - by he's not the one going to hell (man) - Australia

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44464) - you deserved it (2617)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44464) - you deserved it (2617)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML

#21252533
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15602) - you deserved it (36063)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50711) - you deserved it (9746)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43856) - you deserved it (7827)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was sitting in a boring lecture. Out of boredom, I made a fish-faces with my mouth. Somehow, I made the most realistic fart noise I've ever heard in the process. The whole room stared at me. FML

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

#21239720
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34184) - you deserved it (5688)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to a comedy show with my mom, and they asked the audience members to yell out their problems as ideas for an improv skit. My mom yelled, "My daughter can't get a boyfriend!" FML

#21222137
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43137) - you deserved it (4181)

On 07/27/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by Yeppets (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

#21212155
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48132) - you deserved it (6180)

On 07/17/2014 at 7:32pm - animals - by kittynapper - United States (Colorado)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56150) - you deserved it (5206) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)



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