wildhorseman

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Offline (the 05/12/2016 at 10:55pm)

wildhorseman

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 May 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2114
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About wildhorseman : Just another random person.

wildhorseman's page activity

Visits<b>shakeyjay3</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 2:02pm<b>AltoSaxophone</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 3:39pm<b>chuckhorneatcorn</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 8:41am<b>Baustigt</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 8:48am<b>themouseman1212</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 12:04pm<b>WolfAvenge</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 2:59am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 8:03pm<b>meghancuma</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 5:32pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 9:13pm<b>BritishGinger</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 3:30am<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:25am<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:17am<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:19pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 12:54pm<b>Deathwinner95</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 11:44am<b>stupidretriever</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 10:24pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 3:10pm<b>The_War_Doctor</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:48am

wildhorseman's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of wildhorseman's badges

wildhorseman's favorite FMLs

Today, as usual, I stress ate. After having my exams prolonged for an extra week, I ate three extremely large packs of Skittles, and then threw them all up. Taste the rainbow, puke the rainbow. FML

by Sad Student / 02/02/2014 at 10:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

by prochainefois / 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

by confsused / 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a shower with my boyfriend. While we were washing our hair, he got soap in his eyes and mouth. I was facing him, and since his eyes were closed he didn't realize how close I was. When he spat the soap out, it went straight into my eyes. Neither of us could see. FML

by abc123 / 12/16/2013 at 11:44am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought it would be to a good idea to introduce my indoor cat to my dog. The pee stains, multiple scratches, and puncture wounds to my face prove otherwise. FML

by Ramis182 / 12/16/2013 at 3:52am / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I was woken up to the sound of my cat peeing on the pillow next to mine. When I yelled at him, he jumped over my face and off the bed. He was still peeing the entire time. FML

by Cat Piss / 12/15/2013 at 11:58am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML

by numbnuts / 09/23/2013 at 1:48am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I started shaking my son's Little Bill doll in frustration, as the batteries weren't working. My nosy neighbor saw through the window and called the cops. They wouldn't believe me and now the whole neighborhood thinks I'm a child abuser. FML

by baddad / 09/23/2013 at 12:44am / United States / Kids

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

by OldHabitsDieHard / 09/18/2013 at 10:53am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, my mom was sharing the story of how I was born with the umbilical cord around my neck. My sister added that it was God's first attempt to kill me off. FML

Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML

by GotMyBitchBack / 09/05/2013 at 7:02am / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

by smurftastic / 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals

Today, while writing a self-evaluation for my internship, I had to type up answers to certain questions and then submit them. After submission, I re-read one of the answers I had written that said, "After 3 months on the jon I finally feel like I have accomplished a lot." I had meant to write job. FML

by OnCompanyTimeToo / 09/01/2013 at 9:21pm / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Work