Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

wildhobo7

Search for a member

wildhobo7

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 27
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

wildhobo7's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

wildhobo7's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML

#17661103
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47930) - you deserved it (5738)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the ex-girlfriend I'm still in love with sent me an old picture with the caption, "I miss us." She looked beautiful and happy. Too bad I'm not the guy she's kissing in the picture. FML

#15930581
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39994) - you deserved it (3350)

On 04/26/2011 at 2:18am - love - by SadGuy - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40050) - you deserved it (26537) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was checking into a hotel with my boyfriend. A few minutes after we get to our room, the cops show up to our door asking to see some ID from the both of us. The hotel staff had called the cops on us because they thought I was underage and he was going to molest me. I'm 21 and he is 24. FML

#5419115
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37553) - you deserved it (2685)

On 09/22/2009 at 7:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I fell asleep in my last period class. When I woke up my teacher said "you missed your bus". I grabbed all my stuff and ran out the room. My class mates were standing outside the class laughing. We still had an hour left in class. FML

#5145727
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8987) - you deserved it (53109)

On 09/09/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by Victor (man) - United States

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17139) - you deserved it (68375)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, my brother and I were going to give our parents their anniversary gift which cost us over $3000. The gift was a trip to London in August to see a show on Michael Jackson's comeback tour. FML

#3237378
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100426) - you deserved it (9667)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:31am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I brought some cupcakes to my class for my birthday, like all the cool kids do. When it came time to sing happy birthday, the entire class said "happy birthday to" then forgot my name. Except my teacher. She said Steve. My name's Jeff. FML

#2150029
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69133) - you deserved it (6170)

On 05/21/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by theman (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, while walking to class enjoying the warmer weather, a bee flew down my shirt. I'm allergic to bees so I freaked out and started ripping my clothes off. By the time I was done, I was half naked and there was no bee in sight. Turns out, it was the string on my jacket hood. FML

#724794
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50694) - you deserved it (30520)

On 03/31/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my crush and I were hooking up and as he slipped his hands up my shirt in order to "feel me up" he started rubbing around my whole torso. When I asked him what he was doing he replied "well I was looking for your boobs but apparently you have none" FML

#544318
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94185) - you deserved it (8197)

On 03/22/2009 at 11:18pm - intimacy - by tinytitty (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

#507959
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (212188) - you deserved it (27338)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38am - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML

#405303
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (136666) - you deserved it (36823)

On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my dad gave me a promise ring on my one year anniversary with my boyfriend and made me swear I would wait til marriage. Four hours later he walked in on us having sex in my bedroom. FML

#400298
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45840) - you deserved it (240208)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by thiswouldhappen. - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: