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whyME000

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whyME000

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  • Number of visits : 29
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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whyME000's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that I do not possess the upper body, core, or leg strength to hold my girlfriend up during sex. I simultaneously collapsed and dropped her onto her coffee table. We are now both being treated at the hospital; her for glass wounds, me for a concussion. FML

#19864989
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15106) - you deserved it (27028)

On 06/29/2012 at 4:47am - intimacy - by bob (man) - United States (California)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a nude picture, he sent it back to me with a mustache on my face from that iPhone app and told me he likes it much better that way. FML

#19853880
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24289) - you deserved it (8783)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:58am - intimacy - by maggie74 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML

#19838531
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30312) - you deserved it (2856)

On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30806) - you deserved it (3857)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend thought he could make a pregnancy test read positive by jizzing on it. FML

#19822088
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27786) - you deserved it (4247)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by really (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to an extended family reunion. I started chatting to my great grandpa, and he asked me what I do for a living. Before I could tell him I breed animals, my visibly drunk dad interrupted and slurred, "Oh, she jacks things off. Horses, pigs, just about anything, really." FML

#19102316
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26217) - you deserved it (3505)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:13pm - intimacy - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML

#8687
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34132) - you deserved it (13265)

On 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm - animals - by EpicFail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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