About wholock : Don't blink. Blink and you're dead. They're fast. Faster than you can believe. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink. Good luck.
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wholock's favorite FMLs
by kb / 11/18/2013 at 1:38am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Naomi / 11/10/2013 at 5:28am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids
Today, I was watching some episodes of The Walking Dead with my boyfriend, after recently introducing him to the series. A scene involving Carl came on, and my boyfriend said, "God damn. You ever give me a kid that annoying, I'll shoot both of ya right in the head." FML
by kel / 11/08/2013 at 6:50pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Love
Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML
by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by cricketsins / 11/07/2013 at 10:33pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by awkward / 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I put a picture of my cat on Facebook. A stranger sent me a message saying how "attractive" she was and that her eyes are "very seductive". So, basically, someone is trying to hit on my cat. FML
by meow / 10/30/2013 at 3:03am / United States / Animals
by secretsmakefriends / 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML
by Abcporn / 09/25/2013 at 7:22pm / United States (Oregon) / Work
Today, my teacher told the class that we had better like the people at our table because we would all be working together for the final group assessment. Everyone looked at me, stood up, and moved. FML
by Anonymous / 08/13/2013 at 2:36am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by xXxXxTOBIxX / 07/22/2013 at 7:49am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by BlueB / 07/06/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Chelsea / 05/18/2013 at 4:57am / Australia (Western Australia) / Transportation
Today, I learned my husband has what he calls "grumpy wife sex" specifically to cheer me up. I don't know if I'm more annoyed that he casually mentioned it after we've been together for 10 years, or that it actually works. FML
by MommaAnnie / 05/02/2013 at 11:59am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…