whatsupitsbrian

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whatsupitsbrian

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whatsupitsbrianwhatsupitsbrian
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4459
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About whatsupitsbrian : Hey my names Ben and I'm looking for a nice b***ch to get it on with(; hmu. I have some blue eyes, I'm about 3 feet tall on all fours and I weigh almost 50 pounds(; all muscle

whatsupitsbrian's page activity

Visits<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 3:15pm<b>Ben_Dover831</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 4:24am<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 1:37am<b>__justayy</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 10:56pm<b>ApologyKick</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 5:30pm<b>Kobwebs</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 5:28pm<b>nickie_94</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:46am<b>twisted_riri</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 12:38am<b>KagamineRinny</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 10:32pm<b>RusticChick</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:21am<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 10:49pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 2:47am<b>iHappyFeet</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 11:35am<b>dewberry2001</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 9:21am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 1:14am<b>Justincredible69</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 10:09pm<b>dilara_xo</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 3:22pm<b>gavdarv</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 5:02am

Fucked!<b>Ben_Dover831</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 10:24am<b>Kobwebs</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:29pm<b>Angel1999</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:30pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 3:03am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 7:06pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:53pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 12:21pm<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 4:40pm

whatsupitsbrian's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of whatsupitsbrian's badges

whatsupitsbrian's favorite FMLs

Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about it. My brother ended up saying "If god doesn't want me to jerk off, how come he made my knob the perfect shape to fit in my hand?" I burst out laughing and now we're both grounded. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2016 at 4:38am / Intimacy

Today, I asked a short girl to prom by making a "You must be this tall to say no" sign. She grabbed a chair, stood on it, and then said no. FML

by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a party. A guy kept looking at me, so I tried to strike up a conversation with him. I realized he was drunk when he slurred, "Ya know, you're the only girl I've met that's fat AND flat chested!" There goes my self-esteem. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:59am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally put the finishing touches on a huge project after 8 months of gruelling work. My boss had used the promise of a 5-figure bonus to motivate me. When I casually brought the bonus up later in the day, my boss just said "Gratitude's its own reward, Mike." FML

by considering murder / 03/25/2016 at 1:19pm / United States (California) / Money

Today, a classmate accused me of having butt implants because "women can't have a huge ass and pancake tits". FML

by pancaketits / 03/22/2016 at 11:33am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had sex with a guy I really had a connection with. It went perfect until I complimented how his moans during sex turn me on a lot, and he responded with, "That's what my mom told me." I laughed so hard we couldn't go on. FML

by UnicornWaffles / 03/16/2016 at 1:23pm / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to give up going to a therapist because it was too expensive and my parents couldn't afford it. Meanwhile, a girl in my class is getting a therapist for her dog. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2016 at 6:21pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML

by notagoodtime / 02/06/2016 at 3:52pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I told my grandpa that I want to join the police force. His response: "You wanna lynch some blacks without the jail time, eh?" FML

by onlyjuggalos / 01/31/2016 at 3:13am / United States / Work

Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2015 at 5:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I was talking with some friends and the girl I like. During a lull in the conversation, she looked at me and said, "Ugh, I really wanna pop your zits." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 9:45am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my son told me that he doesn't need to go to school because he doesn't need a job. It turns out he plans to get a life sentence in prison and live the rest of his life at the taxpayers' expense. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 12:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, my 18 year old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML

by erphy21 / 09/26/2015 at 4:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my roommate remembered that we have an essay due Monday, so he wrote the full essay, while stoned, in less than an hour, without using his textbook. It was better than the one I spent all week writing. He is now upstairs having sex, and I've lost all motivation. FML

by anonymous / 09/13/2015 at 11:34am / Luxembourg / Work

Today, my "friends" pulled an elaborate prank on me. First, they changed my ringtone to a recording of someone saying "Allahu Akbar" on repeat. Then, they called me as we had a moment of silence in honor of the 9/11 victims. FML

by EverettA / 09/11/2015 at 9:50am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous