Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

what_ever2007

Offline (the 06/03/2014 at 6:07pm) | Search for a member

what_ever2007

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 734
  • Number of comments : 71
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About what_ever2007 : Tell me what you would like to see me post about myself.
Mid-20's, Unitarian Universalist, happily polyamorous - so in my case, my

what_ever2007's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:06am<b>Aerosmith1976</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 4:28pm<b>oliviaarrrr</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:57am<b>annie29</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 8:57am<b>ifknh8usernames</b> - the 04/20/2013 at 12:30am<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 9:53am<b>RN_1324</b> - the 07/25/2012 at 1:00pm<b>Marceline_17</b> - the 07/16/2012 at 1:10pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 06/26/2012 at 1:46pm<b>mycleh13</b> - the 06/16/2012 at 1:19am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 06/15/2012 at 6:10pm

what_ever2007's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of what_ever2007's badges

what_ever2007's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36145) - you deserved it (61397)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608
456 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40569) - you deserved it (140715)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was putting on cream and my son asked what it was for. I told him it was to keep the wrinkles away. He looked at me closely and replied, "I don't think it's working." FML

#2201363
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42624) - you deserved it (5891)

On 05/23/2009 at 1:04am - kids - by julieb (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (426068) - you deserved it (59700)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
687 comments

I agree, your life sucks (702468) - you deserved it (55971)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38553) - you deserved it (129463)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
520 comments

I agree, your life sucks (241810) - you deserved it (32154)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
877 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60119) - you deserved it (628257)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047
1237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (658220) - you deserved it (442359)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: