wellll

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wellll

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  • Number of visits : 1595
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

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wellll's page activity

Visits<b>Bonefish84</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:59pm

wellll's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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wellll's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

by and not even in the good way / 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was ordering a pizza over the phone. When the guy asked for my order, I yelled "Hey, you guys wanted pepperoni, right?" In reality, I was yelling this to my cat. College hasn't made me many friends so far. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2014 at 4:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2014 at 6:13pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping my wife bring in the groceries. She was able to carry 4 bags and a jug of milk. I was struggling with 2 bags. FML

by weak / 02/23/2014 at 9:36am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling really good about myself for running and walking everywhere so much so that I was out of breath and panting. Well, until I remembered that I was playing a video game and it was my character that was doing the running around that is. FML

by Tomb Raider Wannabe / 02/17/2014 at 8:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, my mother thought it would be funny to sneak into my room at night and scream like a demon after I had explained to her how scared I was of the exorcist movie I had just seen. She claims it wasn't her. FML

by so scared / 02/08/2014 at 12:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a black eye while trying to break up a fight caused by some complete bastard making a "yo momma" joke at the funeral of my best friend's mother. FML

by knobbed / 01/27/2014 at 6:09pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Health

Today, my sister found out that Justin Bieber got arrested and now she won't stop crying. 5ML

by Estee1024 / 01/24/2014 at 12:28am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, after I took my first set of exams, my professor posted on Twitter, scoffing at how stupid one student's answer was. The answer he quoted was one that I wrote. FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2014 at 4:41pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother asked me how to block someone on Facebook. Seeing as how my brother never asks me for anything, I took this opportunity to help him. He then blocked me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2014 at 4:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching Ratatouille. Piece of advice for starving students: never watch it when you've only eaten two apples in two days, or you'll find yourself in the ridiculous position of being jealous of a fucking rat. FML

by I.Want.Food. / 01/19/2014 at 6:38pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, it was my first day at my new school. I've never been the new girl before, so I asked my best friend for advice. She said, "Whatever you do, do not, under any circumstances, be yourself." FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2014 at 8:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML

by coop42 / 01/15/2014 at 2:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

by jseid2 / 01/15/2014 at 12:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy