i like to laugh at other people, just like everyone else on this site :P
Today, my girlfriend was sick so I took her 5 year old daughter out to eat. Half-way through our "date" she asks me loudly "Can we go back to the car now and take our clothes off?" Apparently she meant her toy dog's clothes. Face burning, we left a half laughing/half glaring crowd behind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29675) - you totally deserved it (1273)
On 05/15/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by BigBadTron (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19945) - you totally deserved it (25118)
On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my wife of three years asked me to meet her for lunch at Subway. When I arrived she was standing in the parking lot and she handed me a footlong sub and said "I got you a turkey sandwich" and then immediately followed it up with "And I'm leaving you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (62766) - you totally deserved it (2215)
On 05/07/2009 at 6:39pm - love - by Joey (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then proceeded to call out my own name by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17522) - you totally deserved it (66507)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52650) - you totally deserved it (2515)
On 05/06/2009 at 3:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I woke up feeling like something was crawling inside my ear. I immediately went to the doctor's, and was told a roach had crawled into my ear. The doctor tried to drown it with water, but that only caused it to swell up and get stuck. I just had a roach removed piece by piece from my ear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (76352) - you totally deserved it (1949)
On 05/02/2009 at 5:38pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48579) - you totally deserved it (2762)
On 05/02/2009 at 1:05pm - health - by sicktomystomach (woman) - United States (Illinois)
[ Page : 1 ]
« Previous page | Next page »
