Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

warmvanillasugar

Search for a member

warmvanillasugar

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 November 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11573
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

warmvanillasugar's page activity

Visits<b>Nusa1</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 3:59am<b>tacojauns</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 12:54am<b>iztrollinnn</b> - the 02/09/2010 at 9:57pm<b>ha</b> - the 12/14/2009 at 10:23pm<b>KINGLOMP32</b> - the 07/01/2009 at 7:31pm<b>diki</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 12:37pm<b>mhellman3191</b> - the 05/27/2009 at 7:43pm<b>djsubdu3</b> - the 05/27/2009 at 5:42pm<b>Logan23</b> - the 05/27/2009 at 10:41am<b>username666</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 11:10am<b>ibabyd0llaz</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 4:06pm<b>sims224</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 1:14am<b>GtaTomV</b> - the 05/18/2009 at 10:50am<b>kell710</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 11:12pm<b>tiger01</b> - the 05/12/2009 at 4:24pm<b>poolguy3</b> - the 05/12/2009 at 12:04am<b>holynemesis1208</b> - the 05/04/2009 at 8:40am<b>Miniafroftw</b> - the 05/01/2009 at 11:08pm

warmvanillasugar's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

warmvanillasugar's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

#4499384
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67720) - you deserved it (7607)

On 08/13/2009 at 11:23am - intimacy - by esb (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while I was waitressing, I bent down to pick up a menu and accidentally farted, really loud, at my table. FML

#2037920
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47508) - you deserved it (9737)

On 05/18/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML

#662645
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27470) - you deserved it (77421)

On 03/28/2009 at 2:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was in the change room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

#216994
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52048) - you deserved it (3013)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:45pm - misc - by nuberific (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

#206263
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26517) - you deserved it (41514)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend asked me what I enjoyed most about the weekend we'd spent together. I mention in detail a certain move he had pulled when we made love. When asked what he enjoyed most, he replies "putting my fish tank together". FML

#192617
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42746) - you deserved it (5343)

On 03/03/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by lucy (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was driving at night and saw a small animal run across the road. I slammed on my brakes and got rear-ended. The animal turned out to be a plastic grocery bag. FML

#187356
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46235) - you deserved it (14217)

On 03/02/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by himtopia19 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was babysitting this one year old. She just learned how to say yes so if you asked her ANYTHING, she'd say yes. I asked her if she liked vegetables and she said "yes!" Then I asked her if I was pretty... she looked at me and said "NO." FML

#171559
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59622) - you deserved it (13011)

On 03/01/2009 at 3:29pm - kids - by hi (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to give a speech on stage at a local preschool about fire safety. I'm 32 years old and passed out on stage because I felt extremely nervous and intimitated by a group of 4 year olds. FML

#35636
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35327) - you deserved it (7282)

On 02/13/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by buster (man) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: