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waldo899

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waldo899

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 406
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About waldo899 : I love homestuck. My deviantart is waldo899. I also like doctor who. I am a dalek troll human hybrid. Exterminate exterminate

waldo899's page activity

Visits<b>TheDoctor10</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 7:53pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 12:28am<b>threer</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 3:21am

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waldo899's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend got angry because I laughed when he asked me if he should retire from being a Pokemon Trainer. He was serious. He's also 21. FML

#20798065
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39344) - you deserved it (10846)

On 07/22/2013 at 6:14pm - love - by ihatepokemon (woman) - United States

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53174) - you deserved it (9167)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the doctor to have my annual check-up. After the doctor made me waddle across the room towards him, hop on one foot for thirty seconds, and then lay on my stomach and do the worm, he finally said, "OK, that wasn't really part of the check-up. You're large on the hips. Lay off the Cheetos." FML

#20760331
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44457) - you deserved it (11700)

On 07/02/2013 at 7:16pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54087) - you deserved it (3470)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML

#20757330
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39959) - you deserved it (5070)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:49am - work - by Neveragain (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

#20750993
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41233) - you deserved it (2968)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm - work - by keiran123 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was feeding some ducks. One of them choked to death on the old bread. FML

#20744476
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49022) - you deserved it (14028)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - Belgium

Today, my school announced its senior motto for the year. For the second year in a row, it's "YOLO". FML

#20586452
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47780) - you deserved it (5464)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:21pm - misc - by it's a wonder I'm not illiterate as fuck - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was yet again asked to show my hall pass. I'm 23 and work at a middle school. I've worked here for the last five months, so not only do I look 13 years old, I'm also not memorable enough for my own coworkers to recognize me. FML

#20454196
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37796) - you deserved it (2932)

On 01/11/2013 at 8:11pm - work - by Can'tAgeOrMakeFriends (woman) - United States

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27145) - you deserved it (6722)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

#20072555
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25110) - you deserved it (2563)

On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me to text him when I got home to let him know I'd made it home safe. He said if I didn't, he'd assume that aliens had abducted me and that he'd get a new girlfriend. He was completely serious. FML

#20070673
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18423) - you deserved it (3229)

On 09/13/2012 at 7:38pm - love - by TaffyMichele (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML

#20015702
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31322) - you deserved it (8600)

On 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm - misc - by diggingaplotforone - United States (California)

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

#19983177
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27504) - you deserved it (3071)

On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)



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