About vnecksonmybed69 : RAWR!!
About vnecksonmybed69 : RAWR!!
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vnecksonmybed69's favorite FMLs
Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML
by poopooppachuu / 10/11/2011 at 3:32am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
by maniac11 / 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by octoberrain / 10/10/2011 at 7:16pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at Six Flags my boyfriend won a huge stuffed animal for me. After a whole day of carrying it around, when he dropped me off he told me that he wants the stuffed animal back. He just didn't want to carry it around all day. FML
by Username / 10/10/2011 at 9:56am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by melikeyturtles / 10/10/2011 at 12:13am / United States / Work
Today, I came home from work to find the front door wide open, the stove on, my 5 year old cutting up the curtain, and my 2 year old smearing chocolate sauce on the floor. My fiancé was nowhere to be found. Later on, I got a text from him saying that he'd gone to watch the footy. FML
by chocolateisyum / 10/09/2011 at 7:13am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 9:20pm / Australia (Victoria) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
by EFFFF / 10/08/2011 at 6:10pm / United States (Idaho) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 9:04am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML
by ...... / 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend asked my father for permission to marry me. My father refused, on the basis that I'm the only person in the house with a job, and if I leave he will have to start looking for work. My boyfriend won't marry me without his permission, and my lazy father won't change his mind. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2011 at 5:07am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm / Canada / Intimacy
by pixiebubz / 10/05/2011 at 11:59pm / Australia / Health
- Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told… Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm… Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top.…