About violetsweety : Hi I'm Sammie. c: Message me. I like messages. I might be late though because I rarely go on the actual website. I use the app!I go on the website, once a year.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22604) - you deserved it (30977)
On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend of almost a year because he was no longer sexually attracted to me because I'm "overweight," even though I only weigh 130 pounds. Afterward I went to my friend's house and sat in an old wooden chair. It broke into pieces as soon as I sat down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74848) - you deserved it (7919)
On 03/05/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by saltinawound (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids." I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32915) - you deserved it (382883)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by PicturePerfect (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom had my girlfriend and I over. Out of the blue, she pulled out my grandmother's wedding ring and gave it to me saying I can now propose. My girlfriend started screaming and said yes. I have been seeing someone else for 3 months and was going to break up with my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (85805) - you deserved it (192099)
On 03/01/2009 at 4:58pm - love - by MrCanoe (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was just wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and um...stuff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71063) - you deserved it (10854)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:45am - health - by Monty (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (989810) - you deserved it (78782)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (55582) - you deserved it (323935)
On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by Noname - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms for my girlfriend, Kim and I. I was in a rush and when I looked at the cashier realized it was her father. Nervous and hoping to reassure him, I go "don't worry, I'm not using these with Kim." That didn't help. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21498) - you deserved it (55973)
On 02/22/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by madfather (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (177995) - you deserved it (61464)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23775) - you deserved it (338262)
On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML
I agree, your life sucks (484000) - you deserved it (43467)
On 02/07/2009 at 10:08pm - misc - by bittersweet - United States (New York)
Today, I was driving and stopped behind a person at a stop sign. Their car didn't move for about 1 minute. I got out of my car yelling at the person. It was an old woman. She wasn't breathing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11784) - you deserved it (23526)
On 02/04/2009 at 11:44am - health - by Harejordan (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having an affair with for 6 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30853) - you deserved it (241100)
On 02/02/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I masturbated 3 times to the thought of my wife because we don't have sex anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54288) - you deserved it (6481)
On 02/01/2009 at 5:27am - intimacy - by SuperJesus - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, I thought I was giving a woman the orgasm of a lifetime until I realized that she was telling me to stop pulling her hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7541) - you deserved it (28987)
On 01/30/2009 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Hubris - United States (Arkansas)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
