About violetsweety : Hi!
They say I'm cocky, just because I think I am hot. But I think everybody is hot also.
About violetsweety : Hi!
violetsweety's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
violetsweety's favorite FMLs
by go fuck myself / 02/06/2015 at 7:57pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML
by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 01/11/2015 at 2:10pm / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy
Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML
by Anonymous / 11/22/2014 at 10:34am / United States (Maine) / Kids
by liishax3 / 11/22/2014 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Animals
by jigglypluff / 11/19/2014 at 12:27am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy
Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at the treadmill for not going fast enough, and I muttered "roid rage". Apparently said roids give him superhuman hearing, because he heard me from the other side of the room, and threatened to kill me. FML
by juggalomurderer59 / 11/12/2014 at 11:00am / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML
by yee-whore / 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm / United States (Vermont) / Love
Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by Ryuun12 / 10/02/2014 at 11:20pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Wingman527 / 09/15/2014 at 5:39pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals
Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML
by Anonymous / 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm / United States (California) / Love
- Today, I learned that when my coworker asked if he could "quickly" borrow my car, he really meant… Today, I got my novice license. When I got home I asked my parents if I could drive my boyfriend to… Today,I went on a date with a this girl I like. We were leaning on each other. My friend later told…