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About violetsweety : Hi!
They say I'm cocky, just because I think I am hot. But I think everybody is hot also.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I woke up to the sound of footsteps outside my room. I investigated but found nothing. As I went back to my room, I heard a sort of giggling from inside. I was so scared, I grabbed my car keys, got the fuck out of there, and drove to my girlfriend's house in my pajamas. FML
Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML
Today, I got all excited because I thought my crush was flirting with me, when in actuality she was taking advantage of me liking her so she and her friends could make fun of my speech impediment. FML
Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, I went to the movies. A really cute girl sat beside me. I tried to strike up a conversation with her until she turned to look at me and I realized he was a guy. I couldn't even finish the movie because I felt his judging eyes burn holes into me the entire time. FML
Today, I checked my son's browser history, as he's been acting strangely around his computer recently. I found several bizarre Google searches, including but not limited to: "unicorn dick-farts", "sharting kittens", and "can you get AIDS from Asians?" What the fuck is wrong with him? FML
Today, and pretty much every day, my co-worker takes off her shoes while working. The smell of her feet makes me dizzy. I don't know if she's oblivious to the fact that her feet stink, or she just doesn't care. It's affecting the quality of my work. FML
Today, I was sitting in my bedroom relaxing when I heard my little sister and my brother. Thinking it was cute they were talking again, I was listening. They were not just "talking", they were making plans on how to kill me. FML
Friday 12 February 2016