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violetrider123

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violetrider123

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 826
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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violetrider123's page activity

Visits<b>RyZo</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 10:49pm

violetrider123's FML badges

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Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

violetrider123's favorite FMLs

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32119) - you deserved it (6493)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML

#15538339
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33302) - you deserved it (4802)

On 03/28/2011 at 10:22pm - misc - by -_- - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48620) - you deserved it (8008)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

#15448080
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34453) - you deserved it (10789)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

#15432254
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46955) - you deserved it (4445)

On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML

#15426482
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47669) - you deserved it (27061)

On 03/22/2011 at 1:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
491 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34628) - you deserved it (48597)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my long distance girlfriend. She's about a month pregnant. I haven't seen her in person for six months, but she still insists it's mine. I don't know which would be worse: her lying or her being that stupid. FML

#15321178
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54024) - you deserved it (5159)

On 03/15/2011 at 11:50am - love - by notthedad (man) - China

Today, after setting up surveillance in my front yard to see who's dog keeps crapping on my lawn, I finally caught the culprit on film. It was my heroin addict neighbour. FML

#15260051
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36363) - you deserved it (3208)

On 03/10/2011 at 6:09am - animals - by Tom -

Today, a little boy called me on the phone, crying "grandma died" in a broken voice. I just didn't have the heart to say "wrong number." FML

#15250352
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45877) - you deserved it (4201)

On 03/09/2011 at 10:47am - kids - by Waffle -

Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML

#14793203
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27906) - you deserved it (3600)

On 02/01/2011 at 1:37am - misc - by Stormbringer -

Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML

#14790156
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47531) - you deserved it (8095)

On 01/31/2011 at 5:46pm - intimacy - by anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

#14689182
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34667) - you deserved it (6401)

On 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my mother that it is inappropriate to hit on my boyfriend when his parents are over for dinner. FML

#13673860
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29373) - you deserved it (2284)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:00am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was on an airplane, riding in first class for the first time in my life. The man next to me turned to me just before takeoff, stared at my chest, and said that he hoped there would be severe turbulence. FML

#13198134
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32997) - you deserved it (3827)

On 09/25/2010 at 5:49pm - misc - by huj - United States (Texas)



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