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vintaqe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 768
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About vintaqe : •26
•Sunny FL
•Never married, never birthed anything
•Service Dog Trainer by day, catwoman by night

I'm a jack of all trades. You name it, I can do it. I have my own company that specializes in volunteer work for single parents who can't afford child care.

I believe in karma.

I'm not here looking for my Prince Charming. I think that's just weird. I'm not even here to "chat" but if you can make me laugh, I will reply. If you message me with just "hi" or "hey, how are you?" You can bet your sweet toosh I won't reply. Give me content, people.

I am the one you love to hate, a grammar nazi. ;]

"Little angel go away, come again some other day. The devil has my ear today, I'll never hear a word you say. He promised I would find a little solace and some peace of mind, whatever just as long as I don't feel so .. desperate, ravenous. So weak and powerless, over you."

ιoνε νίɴτaƣε

vintaqe's page activity

Visits<b>snowaholicmxz</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 4:27pm<b>HeatherFeatherB</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:55pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:01am<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:32pm<b>Dakota_W</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 10:38pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 3:49am<b>mpkpm</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 12:37pm<b>IzzyInWonderland</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 11:22am<b>rairai</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 8:57am<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 2:53pm<b>freshmaker85</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:10pm<b>Le_Momops</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 1:26pm<b>olpally</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 9:38pm<b>DDCA</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 10:12pm<b>underscore23</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 11:56pm<b>singularstar</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 10:26am<b>goth_pixie</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 6:56pm<b>slappygecko</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 11:50am

vintaqe's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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vintaqe's favorite FMLs

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

#20810724
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56899) - you deserved it (8890)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by JustSomeGuy - United States (Texas)

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56154) - you deserved it (9320)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, I was taken to the hospital after I fell down the stairs. The physician who saw me bit his lip and said he would have to amputate my foot, and I fainted in terror. One of the nurses later told me to "learn to take a damn joke." FML

#20804580
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47733) - you deserved it (9213)

On 07/26/2013 at 12:25pm - health - by picklebug (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend's dream came true; he had always wanted to break a bed during sex. The bed he broke was a heirloom in my family for 150 years. The best part: he was by himself. FML

#20804404
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57400) - you deserved it (4905)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:09am - intimacy - by amiezingme - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband removed the TV from our bedroom to improve our sex life. Still no sex because he watches TV on his iPhone. FML

#20799897
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48969) - you deserved it (4233)

On 07/23/2013 at 6:42pm - intimacy - by oddgrrl99 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML

#20799401
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58397) - you deserved it (5530)

On 07/23/2013 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by MenstruallyFrustrated - United States (Arizona)

Today, my husband was chased out of a bar after he was seen slipping something into a woman's drink. I was the woman, the 'something' was aspirin, and that's the last time we ever try to role-play. FML

#20798724
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47925) - you deserved it (26845)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a speeding ticket while taking my drivers license test. FML

Today, at the restaurant I work at, I gave a man back his change and told him to enjoy the sunny day. He replied by dramatically saying that the sun was his mortal enemy. Thinking he was joking, I asked him if he was a vampire. Turns out he has skin cancer. FML

#3420908
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43276) - you deserved it (14937)

On 07/02/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by Kristache (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

#2275729
730 comments

I agree, your life sucks (273019) - you deserved it (145009)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

#1930337
403 comments

I agree, your life sucks (358704) - you deserved it (17967)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (426053) - you deserved it (59707)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (269895) - you deserved it (17581)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (479526) - you deserved it (29253)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)



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