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vespergreen

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vespergreen

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2171
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About vespergreen : I got to stay high all my life to forget I'm missing you.

vespergreen's page activity

Visits<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 9:04pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:16pm<b>isaac_llama01</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 11:42pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:11am<b>Fancyman123</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 6:35am<b>Shorty197</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:08am<b>quiet_storm09</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 4:10am<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:12am<b>sammy1021</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:25pm<b>srinivasawesum</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 2:47am<b>nela25</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 10:51am<b>NWO666</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 4:46pm<b>chris1045</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:06am<b>Live4funny</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 8:44am<b>thebeast74</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 12:41am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:25am<b>wild_cherry</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 7:45am<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 4:13pm

Liked!<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:16am

vespergreen's FML badges

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vespergreen's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML

#21154562
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46393) - you deserved it (27773)

On 05/28/2014 at 12:28pm - kids - by outsmartedbykids (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML

#21146226
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50686) - you deserved it (6734)

On 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML

#21145062
191 comments

Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML

#21143150
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45683) - you deserved it (3754)

On 05/17/2014 at 5:56pm - misc - by 2ndgenoration (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML

#21142253
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39355) - you deserved it (13502)

On 05/16/2014 at 8:33pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML

#21142181
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35602) - you deserved it (15220)

On 05/16/2014 at 7:20pm - misc - by Female Struggles (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

#21142112
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45592) - you deserved it (12804)

On 05/16/2014 at 6:25pm - intimacy - by wtf (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32624) - you deserved it (52260)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, while at work, I asked an older customer how he was doing. He told me that he'd just lost his wife. I gave my condolences before he clarified that his wife was not dead, but was lost in Walmart. FML

#21139954
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44143) - you deserved it (6508)

On 05/14/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by oh god. - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized that because of my construction job, I have spent such a huge amount of time with older, cynical guys that I keep uncontrollably using the phrase "fucking kids these days" regularly like an idiot. I'm 18. FML

#21139663
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38401) - you deserved it (8102)

On 05/14/2014 at 1:45pm - work - by workfordayzz - United States

Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46946) - you deserved it (6113)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

Today, three different strangers stopped me on the street and asked if I was Brad Pitt. Either there's some kind of conspiracy going on, or I'm the world's ugliest woman. FML

#21137630
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51161) - you deserved it (5029)

On 05/12/2014 at 10:38am - misc - by Lookalike (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, the tornado sirens went off so my family went to the basement and turned on the TV to the local news. The station goes to their sky cam as a trampoline flies by. Quite the sight. When the storm passed, I looked outside to see our trampoline was gone. It was the one flying by on TV. FML

#21137290
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48433) - you deserved it (4417)

On 05/11/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by Gone With the Wind - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

#21134481
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46834) - you deserved it (6316)

On 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm - kids - by imnotastranger (man) -

Today, I was bored at work, so I started browsing the Internet. While I was on my Facebook page, my boss tagged me in a status: "I've been standing behind you for ten minutes." FML

#21134321
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22216) - you deserved it (46130)

On 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by notbrowsingnow (man) - United States



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