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venomousddog

Offline (the 07/30/2014 at 12:34am) | Search for a member

venomousddog

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 21 October 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 738
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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venomousddog's page activity

Visits<b>Owlnight321</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 12:15pm<b>Elric97</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 4:31pm<b>KaneHunter</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 12:47am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 10:02am<b>cassieperiodbee</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 12:43pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 8:00pm<b>MagicGiraffe</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 1:39am<b>Elovena</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 5:50pm<b>Maddy9111</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 3:15pm<b>neeena94</b> - the 01/12/2013 at 8:31am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 3:55am<b>homeboyangst</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 10:09pm<b>chrissy2</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 1:41am<b>theimprobableone</b> - the 11/19/2012 at 12:07am<b>lmc94</b> - the 09/06/2012 at 12:27am

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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venomousddog's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

#20662885
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44222) - you deserved it (3442)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm - work - by sumhub94 - United States

Today, I discovered that the "dish soap" my sister uses to clean our dishes when it's her turn, is actually a semi-toxic floor cleaner. FML

#20661400
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37803) - you deserved it (2605)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:05pm - misc - by emmingle - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76995) - you deserved it (5267)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML

#20657675
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57277) - you deserved it (6992)

On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States

Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML

#20636856
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53404) - you deserved it (7500)

On 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got called an "evil Nazi bitch" because I let a customer know that this is the last day our store will have free plastic bags. FML

#20581805
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32505) - you deserved it (3080)

On 04/09/2013 at 4:18am - work - by steppppphhhhhh - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51122) - you deserved it (5641)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

#20572069
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22196) - you deserved it (65486)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by SayCheese - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after giving my mother and my girlfriend their Christmas presents, I realized just how similar they looked both in box size and wrapping paper. I noticed after my mother gasped upon finding a vibrator in her box. FML

#20420433
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17892) - you deserved it (49801)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15082) - you deserved it (34903)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML

#20408274
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37850) - you deserved it (13817)

On 12/20/2012 at 12:30am - intimacy - by djl (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

#20404919
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25420) - you deserved it (5581)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML

#20403258
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35078) - you deserved it (13787)

On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was doing a presentation in front of my boss. On the last slide, someone had put a picture of a man's cock. I later found out it was my boss who did it. It was his "good reason" to fire me. FML

#20199630
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28396) - you deserved it (1766)

On 12/10/2012 at 9:05pm - work - by golfstar11 - United States (Georgia)



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