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Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet !! She said, ( If your looool so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father cuz I've already banged four guys !! ) FML
Today , I went to see a movie with mah grlfriend an a few others . Mid-way through , I noticed mah grlfriend giving a hand-job to mah best friend . I couldn't believe mah eyes , an I confronted them . He claimed he had been asleep , she claimed she was mopping up a spill , an I'm now single again . FML
Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML
Today... two Jehovah's looool Witnesse rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied... ( Basic reasoning? ) A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits u in the eye. FML
Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, ma two year old daugter decided to crawl on top of te covers on ma bed because se was scared since tere looool was a tunder storm. I tougt se was one of our cats so I kicked er off. Se it te wall.
Today... I Came Home And Saw On Our Fridge... "Please Don't Drink Anymore... I Really Worry About Yur Health" Written By Mah 7-year-old Daughter. I Figured She Wouldn't Ever Fine Out... So I Opened The Fridge. But I Found Another Note On A Can That Said "So Your Going To Drink Anyway?" FML
Today I was a TA 4 a history class an tha class was taking a tast. About halfway through I noticd ona kid had a small piaca of papar in his hand. I ran up tha row grabbd his tast an rippd it into four piacas. Than I took tha nota from him. It said "I baliava in you -Mom." big fat FML
Friday 27 March 2015