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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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veliki

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veliki
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 865
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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veliki's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to sift through hundreds of pages of legal documents. They were all written in Comic Sans font. FML

#16984657 (262)

I agree, your life sucks (25997) - you deserved it (2812)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:04am - work - by chawlay (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was using the restroom when a little girl tried to open my stall. It was locked, so she slid under the door and tried to have a conversation with me while I was pooping. FML

#16767931 (180)

I agree, your life sucks (32650) - you deserved it (2483)

On 06/20/2011 at 6:42pm - misc - by shyshy96679 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend uses me for two things. 1) My food. 2) My sister. FML

#16765667 (324)

I agree, your life sucks (41978) - you deserved it (3776)

On 06/20/2011 at 4:05pm - love - by Maddie - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML

#16755181 (460)

I agree, your life sucks (30843) - you deserved it (4174)

On 06/20/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my ex husband is marrying my sister. FML

#16279756 (321)

I agree, your life sucks (73853) - you deserved it (4227)

On 05/21/2011 at 11:31am - love - by uetlqdja - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

#13823528 (239)

I agree, your life sucks (42784) - you deserved it (5966)

On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML

#8365042 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (14316) - you deserved it (1488)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:40am - intimacy - by thatssickkk - United States (California)

Today, I realized that I'm a sleepwalker and for the past week, that dream where I was giving my roommate a blowjob was real. He just pretended it never happened. FML

#6494612 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (21334) - you deserved it (3164)

On 11/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by chacha - United States

Today, I found out that my wife had an affair with our marriage counselor. FML

#6480893 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (45039) - you deserved it (1930)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:39pm - love - by Nobody (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a Milkbone commercial came on TV. At the end of it, they whistle and throw a Milkbone across the screen, prompting my 100lb German Shepherd to leap off the couch and run head on into my new plasma screen TV. FML

#6134962 (215)

I agree, your life sucks (35883) - you deserved it (3028)

On 11/03/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by doglover (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that the drunk-me deletes my texts, so the sober-me doesn't get mad. Well turns out, whatever the drunk-me said, caused me to lose my job, my girlfriend, and my coffee machine. FML

#6100010 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (8678) - you deserved it (32413)

On 11/01/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML

#5515193 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (38597) - you deserved it (3376)

On 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by screwwyou (woman) - United States (Michigan)