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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25141) - you deserved it (3330)
On 03/16/2010 at 4:51pm - animals - by Adam (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I woke up late for a very important presentation. I got dressed but forgot to wear a bra. During the presentation, I bent down to adjust a shoe strap. I rose to find that the thin straps of my blouse snapped and exposed my breasts. I gave a great presentation and a titty show. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9456) - you deserved it (21262)
On 03/15/2010 at 2:35am - work - by exposed (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my dad asked me if I could convince my mother to get a Brazillian wax. If that's not bad enough, my mother heard and yelled from the other room, "I like my furball." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24421) - you deserved it (1561)
On 03/13/2010 at 5:35am - intimacy - by Grossed Out - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my 18 year old daughter comes home telling me she has been fired from her job at McDonalds. The reason? They had ICarly happy meal toys and she couldn't resist stealing one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18338) - you deserved it (3536)
On 03/05/2010 at 1:10am - kids - by icarlymom (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my 2 year old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5522) - you deserved it (41994)
On 02/24/2010 at 2:45am - kids - by janesays (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend told me I look like a fish gasping for breath when I "finish" during sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10367) - you deserved it (2656)
On 02/24/2010 at 12:05am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Montana)
Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17615) - you deserved it (4991)
On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was checking out a gorgeous woman in spandex with beautiful flowing long black hair on the treadmill at the gym. I spent a few minutes just watching her body move and ripple under the material. She turned off the treadmill and got off, only for me to find out that it was a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7785) - you deserved it (27802)
On 02/21/2010 at 10:16am - love - by anonymous - United States
Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20879) - you deserved it (3494)
On 02/17/2010 at 10:05am - misc - by juwkgo (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21528) - you deserved it (1456)
On 02/17/2010 at 2:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my pet rat had babies. We've only ever owned one rat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18988) - you deserved it (3980)
On 02/16/2010 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I was late to dinner with my anal-retentive parents because my boyfriend was too busy making cock puppets in the shower to get ready to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8150) - you deserved it (1750)
On 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by tacolove69 - United States (California)
Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4991) - you deserved it (17672)
On 02/16/2010 at 11:43am - work - by alex (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my husband told me to hold out my hand. He opened his, and in mine dropped a giant mutant tooth he had pulled a few months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13690) - you deserved it (1559)
On 02/16/2010 at 6:51am - misc - by fmlpgh - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to the shops with my little sister. We had to walk through the lingerie section of the store to get to another part. My sister then yells at the top of her voice 'stop following me you freak'. I had security escort me out of the store, and got many dirty looks. She thought it was hilarious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20035) - you deserved it (1849)
On 02/16/2010 at 3:18am - misc - by Timv86 (man) - Australia (Victoria)
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