Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

vb68

Search for a member

vb68

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1312
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

vb68's page activity

Visits<b>TheManInWhiteXx</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 2:38am<b>Awesome58422599</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:33am<b>AnaMoore</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:10pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:27pm<b>rich443</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 10:56pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:37pm<b>meowmixgirl</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 10:24pm<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 2:13am<b>Garagedwella</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 12:26am<b>arandomtacotree</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 10:18pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 9:19pm<b>w_pony_4ever</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 10:22am<b>izbechillin</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 6:42pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 8:02am<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 11:00am<b>ticklewhizzer</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:35pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:31pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 8:00am

vb68's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of vb68's badges

vb68's favorite FMLs

Today, I was feeling really good about myself for running and walking everywhere so much so that I was out of breath and panting. Well, until I remembered that I was playing a video game and it was my character that was doing the running around that is. FML

#21063762
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17929) - you deserved it (39107)

On 02/17/2014 at 8:57pm - health - by Tomb Raider Wannabe (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I'm stuck in a hotel with my psychotic mom, all because she swore there were "demonic" noises coming from our oven. Yeah, our oven is totally possessed, you idiot. FML

#21061598
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37528) - you deserved it (4308)

On 02/15/2014 at 3:51pm - misc - by fuck my goddamn life (man) - United States

Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML

#21060563
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52871) - you deserved it (5031)

On 02/14/2014 at 5:41pm - intimacy - by accident (man) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally asked the cashier at Wendy's how much their 99 cent chicken nuggets were. I guess he is still laughing at me. FML

#21056193
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35799) - you deserved it (18754)

On 02/10/2014 at 10:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

#21050614
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37971) - you deserved it (7123)

On 02/04/2014 at 8:03pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

#21050194
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53724) - you deserved it (6634)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

#21050005
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40678) - you deserved it (4363)

On 02/04/2014 at 1:16am - misc - by Lithiac - United States (Florida)

Today, I dreamed that Robert Downey Jr. kept flirting with me and asking me out. Each time, I refused him, because I'm taken. When I proudly told my boyfriend, he said, "What the hell? I could've kissed the mouth that kissed the Iron Man!" FML

#21049393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40913) - you deserved it (8315)

On 02/03/2014 at 3:11pm - love - by Can't Believe It. - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41326) - you deserved it (12481)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41530) - you deserved it (4544)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to an important job interview. I was really anxious but tried to soldier on anyway. When I was called in, my nerves got so bad that I reverted to speaking my second language. Not first, second. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting the job. FML

#21035049
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37749) - you deserved it (5455)

On 01/21/2014 at 1:55pm - work - by ugh (woman) - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I went to the health department to get on some birth control. I left the health department without birth control, and with the news that I'm pregnant. FML

#21034014
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45336) - you deserved it (30739)

On 01/20/2014 at 3:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

#21032373
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42986) - you deserved it (6242)

On 01/19/2014 at 12:17am - kids - by MommyProblems (woman) - United States

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

#21031998
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34643) - you deserved it (56431)

On 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML

#21031087
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48610) - you deserved it (6156)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: