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vb68's FML badges
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vb68's favorite FMLs
Today, my 4-year-old twin boys are fighting because they both want to watch the SAME show on Netflix. They don't want the other one to choose, because somehow that invalidates their own choice, even though they both get to watch what they want, which is "Barbie, life in the dream house". FML
by Anonymous / 11/25/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
by strawberry / 11/17/2015 at 12:51pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
Today, I gave a group presentation. Because I didn't know the last names of my group members, I'd put fake ones in, intending to replace them later. I forgot to change them and I ended up giving a presentation alongside a very angry Greg Penishead and Josh Acne. FML
by friendless1004 / 11/12/2015 at 11:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, in an attempt to lower my stress and anxiety, I tried out an anti-stress coloring page on my phone. I couldn't get the color to evenly fill inside the lines and it stressed me out even more, to the point where I started crying at work. FML
by coloring is not for me / 11/10/2015 at 12:52am / United States / Work
by cassieleigh1 / 11/05/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/31/2015 at 3:19am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, at our wedding, instead of saying "I do", my fiancé paused before saying, "I can't do this", stepped down from the altar and proposed to my maid of honor. When she obviously refused, he ran from the venue bawling. He's not returning my calls. FML
by Anonymous / 10/21/2015 at 12:46am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I went to the print shop to get some work printed. The guy serving me printed my entire order wrong because he pushed the wrong button, so it had to be done again. He tried to charge me a fine for the mistake he made because "it's not a viable business otherwise". FML
by Anonymous / 10/20/2015 at 10:40am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Money
by Anonymous / 10/18/2015 at 1:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money
Today, my husband finally admitted that he squandered the last three months of my share of the rent on booze. He then blamed me, demanded more money, asked for a divorce, and stormed out. When he returned he asked, "How am I the bad guy?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2015 at 8:57pm / United States (Kansas) / Love
Today, my boyfriend found out that male goats will stick their tongues out, snort, and garble at female goats in heat. Now he's doing it to me at all manner of times, sound effects and all. I now know why goats ram their heads into things repeatedly. FML
by StillnothowIimaginedmydaygoing / 10/14/2015 at 12:22pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, my son told me that he doesn't need to go to school because he doesn't need a job. It turns out he plans to get a life sentence in prison and live the rest of his life at the taxpayers' expense. FML
by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 12:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/30/2015 at 11:08am / United Kingdom (Renfrewshire) / Love
by erphy21 / 09/26/2015 at 4:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy