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vb68

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vb68

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 3956
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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vb68's page activity

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vb68's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of vb68's badges

vb68's favorite FMLs

Today, I left my dog alone while I went to work, like usual. He usually hangs out in the big bay window that faces the street. Today he decided to steal my vibrator and chew it while sitting in the window. I can only imagine how many people walked by and saw it. FML

#21295699
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30481) - you deserved it (6250)

On 11/09/2014 at 8:12pm - animals - by dogdays (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my neighbor's five-year-old rode his tricycle into a history diorama I had spent days slaving over. When I confronted him, he just said, "Vroom vroom muthafucka." FML

Today, I looked at my twelve-year-old daughter's test. One of the question was, "When is a good time to worry about your parents?" Her answer was, "When they take selfies, because selfies aren't made for old people." FML

#21292082
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30170) - you deserved it (5597)

On 11/04/2014 at 4:48pm - kids - by The Selfie Parent - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, my daughter admitted to me that the only reason she's nice to me is because I give her money. She's six. FML

#21290277
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31896) - you deserved it (4900)

On 11/02/2014 at 4:09am - kids - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was stuck in the elevator at my building, so I pushed the emergency button which made a ringing noise. After half an hour, I hear someone yelling to the elevator, "Could you stop pushing that button, there are kids sleeping." FML

#21289322
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33145) - you deserved it (2366)

On 10/31/2014 at 9:26pm - misc - by Virginy - France

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

#21288917
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31379) - you deserved it (2618)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:55am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, my dad vehemently refused to let me go on vacation to France with my best friend, because he watched Taken a few months ago and apparently forgot that it's just a movie. FML

#21287659
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31349) - you deserved it (3985)

On 10/29/2014 at 1:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at a football game with my boyfriend. I said my hands were getting cold, hoping he'd hold them. He replied, "Uh, they make pockets for a reason..." and physically showed me how to put my hands in my pockets. FML

#21280399
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33308) - you deserved it (6566)

On 10/18/2014 at 10:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend gave his penis a high five for not getting me pregnant. He does this every time I get my period. Every. Single. Time. FML

#21279390
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37966) - you deserved it (5943)

On 10/16/2014 at 9:27pm - love - by highfive - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said, "Wait, sloths are real?" She thought Ice Age made them up. FML

#21273306
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36400) - you deserved it (3063)

On 10/08/2014 at 2:02am - animals - by queenmeme - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I was a test tube baby. He looked at me with confusion before asking, "But if scientists made you, surely you'd be really attractive and talented and stuff?" FML

#21272259
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39593) - you deserved it (4185)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:47pm - misc - by thanks babe - United Kingdom (Shropshire)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I realized the sweet, sensitive girl I was talking to on a dating site was actually my brother trolling me for fun. FML

#21266998
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40081) - you deserved it (5623)

On 09/28/2014 at 1:12pm - love - by jquaw - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44301) - you deserved it (7525)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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