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vanessuhm

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vanessuhm

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1104
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About vanessuhm : Hey, I'm Vanessa, currently a Senior in high school.

vanessuhm's page activity

Visits<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 11:00pm<b>ohWHALESaye</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 5:52pm<b>sxcthaigirl</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 9:44am<b>jackjackattack3</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 12:22am<b>LaPaisa</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 4:48am<b>maxymum7</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 10:20am<b>DerekCorbett</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:27pm<b>moonlightknight</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:17pm<b>LolMoqz</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 9:19am<b>teddygrams16</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 8:09pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 9:48pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 5:33pm<b>Markymark1202</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:43pm<b>IceMan11</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 9:04pm<b>pluviophile</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 1:13am<b>ironfey</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 9:52am<b>Mfroz</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 12:18pm

vanessuhm's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of vanessuhm's badges

vanessuhm's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48155) - you deserved it (7818)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, on my way home from work, I decided to bring my pregnant wife a bouquet of roses to surprise her. Her response? "Why didn't you get me something useful, like chicken wings, instead?" FML

#16583514
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40300) - you deserved it (9647)

On 06/09/2011 at 7:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found a link to a porn website on my boyfriend's computer. A bit jealous, I asked why it was there. He told me that he thought thinking of me might get boring. FML

#16233240
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24880) - you deserved it (18953)

On 05/18/2011 at 1:15am - intimacy - by thoughtitwasspecial (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I learnt that eating McDonald's, Twisties, Chocolate and popcorn, then regretting it and going to the gym is a bad idea. I discovered how far vomit, on a moving treadmill, can be thrown across a room. FML

#16054918
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11120) - you deserved it (42780)

On 05/05/2011 at 9:47am - health - by gymgirl (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I was reading a blog post by a girl that I really like. In the post, it said, "I know I'm not beautiful." I told her that I thought it wasn't true at all. She responded by crying hysterically and asking me why I would say that. It turned out that it actually said, "I know I'm beautiful." FML

#15714143
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21216) - you deserved it (28543)

On 04/09/2011 at 8:24pm - love - by Arran (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML

#15546142
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33085) - you deserved it (4957)

On 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm - misc - by uggo - United States

Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML

#15109555
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45462) - you deserved it (19081)

On 02/25/2011 at 12:12am - intimacy - by greenchan (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, it was both my and my stepmother's birthday. In preparation, my dad bought a huge banner with my stepmother's name on it, and a lovely birthday cake. When I told him it was also my birthday, he just grunted and taped a post-it note to the banner with my name on it. Same with the cake. FML

#14853922
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37102) - you deserved it (2571)

On 02/05/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by stinkerweeder (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49006) - you deserved it (3996) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, I wrote a poem and was very proud of it. I showed it to my mom. After reading it, her response was, "What is this shit?" FML

#14739407
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25245) - you deserved it (5187)

On 01/28/2011 at 1:21am - misc - by snappyPi -

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a black eye by running into a door. To avoid being teased about her clumsiness, she's telling everyone that I beat her. FML

#14616204
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40859) - you deserved it (3179) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML

#14391012
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37756) - you deserved it (6754)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:14am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, in art class, we made plaster masks. We were supposed to put Vaseline on our partner's face so the plaster didn't rip their facial hair out. My partner forgot to put it on my eye brows and eye lashes. My face is now completely hairless. FML

#14217567
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31937) - you deserved it (6387)

On 12/15/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by Charlayyyy -

Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML

#13536412
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35307) - you deserved it (6605)

On 10/21/2010 at 11:20am - misc - by maddiee. (woman) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, my perfectly sane and healthy 90 year old grandmother had a heart to heart with me. She told me she'd pay for a boob job. When I asked why, she said, "Sweetie, you'll never attract someone with those tiny suckers." FML

#13466592
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28202) - you deserved it (3527)

On 10/16/2010 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)



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