v1kt4r

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v1kt4r

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 19 November 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 26186
  • Number of comments : 251
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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v1kt4r's page activity

Visits<b>DrizzlePaws</b> - yesterday at 12:39am<b>taylapenguin</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 3:30am<b>Ultigmr</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 1:42pm<b>killzmillz</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 9:56pm<b>tyee47</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 6:35pm<b>skylanderninja</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 10:29pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 7:39pm<b>hiddenUSERNAME</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 11:17am<b>CaptainCrow</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 7:33pm<b>luther48</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 7:52am<b>llamadramas</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 1:05am<b>Mad_Maxx</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 8:39am<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 12:06am<b>Fuckthisbeabitch</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:50am<b>LizGillz</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 12:00am<b>heroqucas</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 6:19am<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:13pm<b>Marjo86</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 12:58pm

Fucked!<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 6:50am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 1:38pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 4:20am

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v1kt4r's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

by Lilypad / 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2013 at 6:37pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML

Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML

by cremyfrozentreat / 03/10/2013 at 9:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 2:02am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

by RedWaters / 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

by cjw / 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm / United States / Kids

Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML

by peace out / 03/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (South Carolina) / Kids

Today, after a long work shift, I was so tired that I took a nap in my car to avoid driving half-asleep. When I awoke, there was a huge truck in front of me. I thought I'd fallen asleep while driving and was about to die. I only realized it was stationary after I pissed myself. FML

by FUCKKKS / 03/03/2013 at 12:37pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

by parental failure / 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my girlfriend can do Heath Ledger's "Joker" voice perfectly. I'm not sure if I should be scared or impressed. FML

by nerdgirlmickey / 03/03/2013 at 11:05am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML

by Ihatemylife / 03/03/2013 at 7:17am / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Intimacy

Today, I was told by co-workers with whom I have worked for 2 years that I tan too much and dye my hair black too often. I'm from the Middle East and have never tanned nor dyed my hair. My co-workers think I'm a wannabe. FML

by wannadi / 03/03/2013 at 4:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my 20-year-old daughter staggered into my room at two in the morning, drunker than I ever thought a person could be, screaming for me to make pancakes for her. FML

by Ugh / 02/27/2013 at 4:42pm / United Kingdom / Kids