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uzee

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uzee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 March 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8185
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About uzee : Life is a moment. It's our job to make it seem like it lasts forever

uzee's page activity

Visits<b>LAUREN_1053</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 3:59am<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 5:09am<b>TeJadaTJD</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:45pm<b>imjanty</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:22am<b>simplyblades</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 8:40pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 6:38am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 2:16pm<b>Whynotnowandhere</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 4:22pm<b>akosua</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 6:45pm<b>legendofizzy</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 5:06am<b>Fidge86</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 1:40pm<b>veebiter</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 7:08pm<b>ScottMC</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 1:31pm<b>tabrowne898</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 10:04am<b>Global_User</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 8:56am<b>FMLprincess023</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 8:47am<b>emily_dunbar15</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 7:15pm<b>gabylikescheese</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 11:15am

uzee's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of uzee's badges

uzee's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML

#16508942
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64595) - you deserved it (3801)

On 06/05/2011 at 1:17am - love - by dumped - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend went on a date with her mechanic. She said it was to get discounts when she goes in for maintenance. Not only does she not see a problem with it, but she's probably getting discounts on other services too. FML

#16499106
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33310) - you deserved it (4795)

On 06/04/2011 at 1:37pm - love - by hcflorence1 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend's band has become quite popular on YouTube. My friends and sister won't stop singing their songs. Most of them were written after I dumped him, and go on to say how much better off he is without me and how horrible I am. FML

#16495662
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31490) - you deserved it (21837)

On 06/04/2011 at 7:35am - love - by guttedgirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, while babysitting I decided to play with a children's puzzle to pass the time. Fifteen minutes in I gave up. The kid then came over and put it together in less than five. There were only ten pieces. FML

#16481636
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10315) - you deserved it (55643)

On 06/03/2011 at 10:04am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, my sister drove past me while i was walking home in the rain, she honked to let me know she was there, and kept on driving. FML

#16480060
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36895) - you deserved it (3221)

On 06/03/2011 at 4:55am - misc - by myhairgetsfrizzywhenwet (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML

#16468673
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38545) - you deserved it (5410)

On 06/02/2011 at 2:43pm - kids - by fuck (man) - United States

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

#16451971
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22686) - you deserved it (58956)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML

#16450721
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14973) - you deserved it (43109)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
489 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15829) - you deserved it (74770)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tore up my airborne academy admission documents because my lab results weren't good enough. A few hours later, they called me to apologize for the misunderstanding, mine turned out to be perfect and they'd accepted me. They need me tomorrow with all the documents to finalize the admission. FML

#16263514
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15350) - you deserved it (37240)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:46am - work - by SkyDiver -

Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML

#16166578
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38784) - you deserved it (4357)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by IhateThem - United States

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

#16161351
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38676) - you deserved it (9894)

On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was riding my long board. A few feet from me an attractive girl was riding one too, in the same direction. We made eye contact right as I slammed into a light pole. She then fell because she was laughing so hard. FML

#16136002
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31160) - you deserved it (8973)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:01pm - love - by TheNerd (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to give his mother a box of chocolates and flowers for Mother's Day. She just stared at them and said, "What's this for? You're not my daughter, and never will be. But I'll keep the chocolate." FML

#16100276
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45068) - you deserved it (5722)

On 05/09/2011 at 12:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my parents woke me up by pouring a glass of freezing cold water over my head. Their reason? They were 'bored'. FML

#16022547
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32064) - you deserved it (4647)

On 05/02/2011 at 7:00pm - misc - by missmirror (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)



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