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  • Number of visits : 2401
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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uuuuughhhh's page activity

Visits<b>ajh1551</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 1:04pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 10:05pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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uuuuughhhh's favorite FMLs

Today, I decorated my boyfriend's house for Christmas as a surprise, just in time for him and his family to come home. Also just in time for him to tell me he's Jewish. FML

#21322002
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14881) - you deserved it (4577)

On 12/22/2014 at 10:04am - love - by cwhitney7 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out I was the top ranking sales person for 2014. What did last year's winner receive? An all-expenses paid weekend holiday. What did I receive? A ham. I'm vegetarian. FML

#21321989
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16155) - you deserved it (1632)

On 12/22/2014 at 9:24am - work - by Bahhumbug (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

#21321894
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15298) - you deserved it (2510)

On 12/22/2014 at 3:05am - love - by ScottyB - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, as I was saying bye to my girlfriend, I said "see ya later, alligator." She took offense because she thought I called her ugly. FML

#21321170
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23139) - you deserved it (2835)

On 12/20/2014 at 10:37pm - love - by sexualpopcorn - United States (California)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of the supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML

#21321028
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22811) - you deserved it (2541)

On 12/20/2014 at 5:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I took a late-night shower. When I got out afterwards, the bathroom door was ajar, and I could have sworn I heard the faint patter of footsteps in the kitchen. "It's probably the cat," I told myself. Then I went upstairs and saw my cat asleep on my bed. FML

#21320813
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26321) - you deserved it (2099)

On 12/20/2014 at 9:41am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was fired for "smelling like garbage". I'm the guy who throws the garbage into the truck. FML

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

#21320716
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26501) - you deserved it (3568)

On 12/20/2014 at 2:33am - love - by qyx3lmnop24 - United States (California)

Today, after six long, hard years of involuntary celibacy, I was finally about to get laid. Except it was just a dream, and in it my mom stormed in just as things got heated, called me a useless cunt, and told me to go do my chores. I guess my brain forgot I moved out years ago. FML

#21320480
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25121) - you deserved it (3067)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:14pm - intimacy - by giantblueballsthesizeofjohnnysinscock (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was shocked to notice that my hair has started growing out entirely silver, supposedly due to pregnancy. I'm 19. Apparently, according to my aunt, "It runs in the family." FML

#21320202
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26609) - you deserved it (5412)

On 12/19/2014 at 5:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML

#21319715
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28403) - you deserved it (4331)

On 12/18/2014 at 12:59pm - love - by peteto818 (woman) - Bulgaria (Pernik)

Today, I had my midterm finals for AP Literature. My teacher had good news and bad news for us. The bad news? That he lost the file for our original exam and so had to make a harder exam for us. An exam he told us not to study for. The good news? "Jesus Christ suffered and died for our sins." FML

#21319606
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29893) - you deserved it (2805)

On 12/18/2014 at 7:11am - misc - by subversivepanda (woman) - Guam

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML

#21319263
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24310) - you deserved it (9975)

On 12/17/2014 at 5:41pm - health - by Recovering Alcoholic - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

#21319149
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27883) - you deserved it (5461)

On 12/17/2014 at 1:47pm - misc - by RIP Turd (peacebeuponit) (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, a student's mother sent me an e-mail complaining that I was requiring her child to read a book containing mild profanity. She then demanded me to let him read an easier book. This would've been somewhat acceptable if the student wasn't in the 12th grade. FML

#21318762
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30623) - you deserved it (2365)

On 12/16/2014 at 9:11pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)



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