usaidwhat82

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Offline (the 01/21/2016 at 4:00am)

usaidwhat82

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1577
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About usaidwhat82 : Hi! I enjoy playing soccer and drawing.

usaidwhat82's page activity

Visits<b>Allnightampm</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 9:33pm<b>therealputin</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 3:09pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:58am<b>besosforme</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 10:43pm<b>Angsty_Armadillo</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 4:44pm<b>vikingshayne</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:26pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:31pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 7:03pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 4:43am<b>RickySleeves</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 12:31am<b>carebear1228</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 6:04pm<b>jacky75</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:21pm<b>justbri__</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 7:44am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:21pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 10:57pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 12:00am<b>CARCA55</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:10pm<b>cooltatgar</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 12:04pm

Fucked!<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 1:03am<b>briang959</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 8:11pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:52am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:05pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 9:56pm<b>Railworker12</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:53am<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 8:58am

usaidwhat82's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

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usaidwhat82's favorite FMLs

Today, I texted my friend asking if he'd like to join my "porno group". I meant promo. I quickly texted back correcting the mistake, but not before I received the nudes he sent. FML

by hiitisbrooke / 11/23/2015 at 3:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I brutally stabbed a guy to death for smiling at me, then puked and fainted. Then I woke up in bed, panicking, sweating like a pig and crying because I thought my dream was real and I was going to go to prison. I'm never taking sleeping medication again. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2015 at 4:14pm / Germany / Miscellaneous

Today, I was unaware that me losing my virginity was also breakup sex. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2015 at 2:08pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my flight was at the other side of the airport. I ran to the gate, to find that the flight had moved to the other side of the airport. So I ran again to miss my plane by a minute. However I did get a new flight... at the other end of the airport. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2015 at 3:09pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, as I kissed my husband after our wedding vows, my mother-in-law muttered "Slut." loudly from the front row. Everyone heard her, but kept smiling and pretended to be oblivious. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2015 at 2:56pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, after constant avoidance, I saw the man who slept with my mother and caused my parents to get divorced. I desperately wanted to punch him in the face, but instead I had to smile and shake his hand as he gave me my diploma. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2015 at 1:41pm / Miscellaneous

Today, a customer yelled, "I'll bash your fuckin' face in, cunt" at me at 9:30am because we don't serve the lunch menu at breakfast time. Yes, the 15-year-old girl in high school is responsible for McDonald's entire menu. FML

by McFuckYouTooCunt / 06/11/2015 at 9:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids

Today, I missed my bus. But it didn't miss me. I've been in the hospital for 8 hours with a broken leg. FML

by FrickingBusDrivers / 05/21/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm / United States / Work

Today, I surprised my 7 and 1.5 year old girls with a princess dinner. I quickly realized it was a scam when the "princesses" arrived looking more suited to a bachelor party. I was able to quickly get the girls out, but have spent the evening explaining why Pocahontas was heavily tattooed. FML

by colorfun / 05/17/2015 at 11:38pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my drunken feminazi mother shouted to me at the top of her lungs, "All men are fucking assholes, and your new husband is no different!" during our wedding reception. All he did was ask her how she liked the salmon. FML

by How's the salmon? / 05/10/2015 at 2:00am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my teacher took my test along with another student's and gave us both a zero. Why? Because we both have colds so when we breathe through our nose it makes a sniffle noise. She thought we were using a secret code to communicate by sniffling. FML

by Mr. Sniffles / 03/23/2015 at 11:43am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

by birdisnottheword / 03/11/2015 at 9:55am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

by killme / 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous