Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

urbantrashcan

Search for a member

urbantrashcan

10Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 577
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About urbantrashcan : My username speaks for itself

urbantrashcan's page activity

Visits<b>RMLrapemylife</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:44am<b>daveydavidson111</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 2:50am<b>Faddyy6</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 4:08pm<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 10:01pm<b>saidmoh1406</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 7:13pm<b>Gargoyl</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:21am<b>persianchick</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:00am<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 5:34pm<b>hypershart</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:27pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:33pm<b>kawayi</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 5:11pm<b>theblues14</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:29pm<b>gopi</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:30pm<b>siham_maghrabia</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 10:47am<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 9:14am<b>Artigedude65</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 8:24am<b>bardo264</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:57am

Fucked!<b>persianchick</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 10:00am<b>TXFernwoods</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:07am<b>ali282h</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 5:38am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:21am<b>Kamorka</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 1:13pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:48pm<b>Morticia_Addams</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 7:35am<b>WildShortstop13</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 5:52am<b>bitchplease55555</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 8:22pm<b>j_inks23</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 4:56am

urbantrashcan's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of urbantrashcan's badges

urbantrashcan's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally reached the point where it became necessary to give my boyfriend an ultimatum: either clip your toenails, or we aren't having sex. FML

#21405555
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28986) - you deserved it (2818)

On 05/06/2015 at 8:50am - love - by anon - United States (Kansas)

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

#21346279
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32971) - you deserved it (15340)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, like every day, I woke up at 3 in the morning because my roommate needs "a three hour warning" before his real alarm goes off. His alarm is a constant beeping noise which he always ignores for a good 10 minutes before finally getting up and turning it off. FML

#21338310
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30076) - you deserved it (2852)

On 01/16/2015 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, at Christmas dinner, my grandmother talked about the death of every single dog she ever had. All 10 of them. FML

#21323815
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30784) - you deserved it (2567)

On 12/25/2014 at 6:47am - misc - by dunn76 - United States

Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML

#21314908
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18222) - you deserved it (41385)

On 12/10/2014 at 7:59am - love - by mastel07 (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML

#21314908
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18222) - you deserved it (41385)

On 12/10/2014 at 7:59am - love - by mastel07 (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed in Charlie Brown's ghost costume, a white sheet with holes all over. I got beat up for dressing like a member of the KKK. FML

#21289401
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34640) - you deserved it (6864)

On 10/31/2014 at 11:59pm - misc - by Halloween Fail (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

#21154464
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49337) - you deserved it (5880)

On 05/28/2014 at 10:21am - love - by needanotherbed - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, my allergies are so bad that it's affected the way my voice sounds. It's so bad my mom has taken to calling me Aflac because I sound like the duck in the commercials. FML

#21153823
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40304) - you deserved it (4217)

On 05/27/2014 at 8:13pm - health - by cc13799 - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML

#20661009
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44468) - you deserved it (3213)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I wanted to take a bubble bath with the jets in the bath that I haven't used in years. When I got in, it took me a while to realize that the jets had squirted out slime and a family of unidentifiable bugs that have probably been living there for years. FML

#20060052
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23994) - you deserved it (8692)

On 09/06/2012 at 2:38am - misc - by juliannamelissa - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked into a gas station to get a bag of chips. Upon moving towards the counter to pay, I noticed the cashier had what looked like a golf ball stuffed in his cheek. I said to him in a joking manner, "That's a huge pinch of dip!" His reply, "It's mouth cancer." FML

#17877282
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15439) - you deserved it (49063)

On 10/01/2011 at 8:33am - misc - by lollipopgreen - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML

#14003911
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33247) - you deserved it (4360)

On 11/27/2010 at 9:17pm - health - by fulloshit - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought a new pack of "feminine wipes" on my way over to my boyfriend's house after a long day of work. He saw them in my purse and sweetly told me I shouldn't be so self conscious. Later on, when he was going down on me, he said, "I take back what I said earlier." FML

#13103525
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27828) - you deserved it (8233)

On 09/18/2010 at 8:15pm - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I flew into New Zealand to surprise my girlfriend on her trip. In the New Zealand Airport I received a text message saying she wanted to break up with me. I live in Michigan and just spent $1,500 for this romantic surprise. FML

#153783
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90006) - you deserved it (6853)

On 02/27/2009 at 4:19pm - love - by uthinkucandraw (man) - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • RoSaCe's illustrated FML
  • Back to business! Yep, everyone is back from their vacation, unless you're a rich, childfree, lovin' life-type of person who doesn't go on holiday when everybody else does, and can do whatever they…

Friday 4 September 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: