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unotrea's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by Till We Pass Out / 10/03/2015 at 11:30am / United Kingdom (Calderdale) / Health
by tkoester / 08/29/2015 at 12:29am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML
by AOart1st / 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm / United States (California) / Health
by LadyDeadpool88 / 02/04/2014 at 9:50am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
Today, in order to try and get over my slight fear of swans, I went down to the local park to feed them. One decided that I looked tastier than the bread I was throwing and chased me around the feeding area while everybody laughed. FML
by Evil_Angel_90 / 09/10/2013 at 7:36am / Australia / Animals
Today, I woke up at 6am and went into the kitchen, where I saw a mouse in front of the fridge. Petrified, I stood in the doorway shooing it for a few minutes. My husband then walked into the kitchen, picked up the "mouse", and threw it in the bin. It was a used tea bag. FML
by Tea_baggins / 08/06/2013 at 12:01am / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals
Today, I came home from work to my hot roommate cooking and wearing nothing but an apron. She pulled me into her room and things went great. At least, they did before I woke up in the break room with my coworkers and boss all gathered around, listening to me talking in my sleep. FML
by Dirty_Mind_69 / 07/20/2013 at 4:35am / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/06/2013 at 3:11am / United States (California) / Transportation
by ohfuckwaffles / 01/29/2013 at 12:28am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML
by FauteuilEver Alone / 07/05/2012 at 4:11am / France / Miscellaneous
by authorsubmit / 05/04/2012 at 8:49am / United States / Health
by questionmark707 / 04/12/2012 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Transportation
by soupisyummy / 02/11/2012 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I began to walk across the street when I saw a very familiar old lady struggle across it. I walked over to help her, and only after she had blown her rape whistle and socked me in the nuts did she realize I was her grandson. FML
by John / 06/30/2011 at 4:18am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today my mom, bored lover of games and mysteries, bragged about outsmarting scammers by burning all…
- Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus… Today, I stumbled upon a slightly drunk neighbor, trying to type in the entry code with his penis.…